The only thing worse than getting up early in the morning to read and regurgitate the news โ€” among other things โ€” is doing it on the weekend. There really is no crappier an hour.

But the bitches are back, and so are our hangovers and our sleep-deprived musings on Harry Reid, the first male prostitute in Nevada, Andy Rooney, Bob Rubin, moral hazard and what the hell it is we're going to write about today.