Gwyneth Paltrow Sued for Allegedly Skiing Into Someone, Skiing Away

Illustration for article titled Gwyneth Paltrow Sued for Allegedly Skiing Into Someone, Skiing Away
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Imagine, for a moment, that you are skiing down a crisp mountain in Utah, sun shining, wind in your hair, birds pecking at the ice in your mask. Suddenly, an effervescent Himalayan salt-infused body comes out of nowhere and smacks you to the ground before skiing off. “Who WAS that?” you ask your wife, as paramedics lift your bloody torso onto on a gurney. “It was Gwyneth Paltrow,” your wife says, waving goodbye as they shut the ambulance doors.


This very scenario more or less came to pass, at least according to Terry Sanderson, a Utah doctor who is suing Paltrow for over $3.1 million, the equivalent of about 193,750 months of GOOP enchanted crystal subscriptions. Per People, Sanderson says he was skiing at the at the Deer Valley Resort in Park City, Utah in February 2016 when Paltrow “skied out of control and hit” him on the slopes. They both fell to the ground, Sanderson alleges, but then Paltrow “got up, turned and skied away, leaving Sanderson stunned, lying in the snow, seriously injured.”

“Gwyneth Paltrow knew it was wrong to slam into Dr. Sanderson’s back, knocking him down, landing on top of him, knocking him out and then leave the scene of the skit crash she caused, but she did it anyway,” Sanderson alleged in the lawsuit.

A rep for Paltrow denied the claims. It is impossible for Paltrow to bump into someone, you see, for she has transcended the physical state, and you can too, if you spend $60 on these body stickers.


R&B star James Ingram has died.

Ingram was a two-time Grammy winner and Oscar nominee who had a slew of hits in the 1980s, including “Baby, Come to Me” and “Just Once.” He also co-authored Michael Jackson’s 1982 hit “P.Y.T (Pretty Young Thing).”

Ingram was 66. His cause of death has not yet been disclosed.

[Page Six]

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I refuse to judge B. Smith’s husband.  If you haven’t lived it you have no vote, opinion or advice to offer.