George Clooney's Twin Toddlers Speak Fluent Italian, Unlike Their Parents, and I Welcome Our New Overlords

Illustration for article titled George Clooneys Twin Toddlers Speak Fluent Italian, Unlike Their Parents, and I Welcome Our New Overlords
Image: Stuart C. Wilson (Getty Images)

George Clooney paid Jimmy Kimmel Live a visit on Wednesday, where he revealed to the worst man in late-night that his twin toddlers with wife and notable smart person Amal Clooney, three-year-olds Alexander and Ella Clooney, speak fluent Italian. Unfortunately, he and his wife do not, so they’ve begun using their bilingual abilities as a way to communicate without their parents understanding. “It’s terrible. We’ve armed them with a secret language,” George joked on television.

One: if that is somehow true and not hyperbole, these kids are probably going to plot out world domination before they can legally drink, and frankly, I welcome our new overlords. Two: I’m not sure any kid is fluent in anything at 3, but it is likely that they will become fluent, learning at such a young age. At any rate, this strikes me as parental bragging, so many celebrities are really just like mom. [NBC’s Today]

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As the endless news cycle echoes out indefinitely, only becoming increasingly tedious with every ineffectual lawsuit launched by the Trump campaign in a limp effort to steal the election from President-Elect Joe Biden, it’s hard to find comfort. Might I suggest this delightful minute-long video of comedian Leslie Jones going hard for Vanity Fair National Correspondent Emily Jane Fox’s kitchen backsplash? Its puke green subway tile design strikes a nerve within her, to the point where I’m like, “Maybe it is good?”

“Your backsplash is killing the game, boo. And your little shelves with your dishes and shit? Is those wooden bowls? Or are they clay?” Jones says in the clip. “I love your backsplash, and the fact that we can see your hood on your stove—that’s an important thing to me. That’s important that you exhaust in the house... I just love you. I love this.”

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I can’t imagine a higher compliment! Watch it. [Leslie Jones’ Twitter]


  • An “irate construction worker” allegedly fired shots at Billie Lourd’s Los Angeles home after being let go from the job. Lourd was not home at the time, and no one was injured. [New York Post]
  • Miley Cyrus still loves ex-husband Liam Hemsworth, but “there was too much conflict.” [E!]
  • Looks like Selling Sunset’s Chrishell Stause is maybe dating Dancing With the StarsKeo Motsepe? Maybe? [Page Six]
  • My heart has One Direction and it’s toward Harry Styles saying very nice things about his former boy bandmates. [Just Jared]
  • Rent the haunted beach house from HBO Max’s The Undoing, pretend you’re Nicole Kidman hiding from Hugh Grant, why don’t ya? It’s on Airbnb. [New York Post]
  • In case you’ve forgotten, Vanderpump RulesLaLa Kent is very pregnant right now. [Us Weekly]

Senior Writer, Jezebel

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DISCUSSION

itsnotaboutthepasta
itsnotaboutthepasta

How has George had his Lake Como villa for DECADES and still isn’t familiar enough with the language to converse with three-year-olds? That’s just lazy.