Gain Weight, Lose Your Husband. Obviously.

Our favorite lady-baiting UK tab has some charming insight for you this Christmas week: Men dump fatties. Any questions?

The highly scientific source for a Daily Fail article headlined, “Why Putting On Just Half A Stone Will Cause Your Husband’s Eyes To Start Wandering” is a survey from a company called SlimWeight Patch. There’s even a helpful sales pitch for the patch at the end!

Let’s go to the numbers:

Almost 42 per cent of men interviewed said they would be less attracted to their girlfriend if they gained half a stone in weight. And five per cent even said they would consider ending the relationship altogether.

Women, on the other hand, appear to be less shallow. Only seven per cent admitted they would find their partner significantly less attractive if they were to gain weight. Overall, more than three quarters of respondents said weight gain was a turn off, with just 21 per cent admitting they would find their partner more attractive.

There were 948 people in the survey (no word on how it was conducted). Assuming the split between men and women was roughly equal, that’s about 23 British men who said they would “consider ending the relationship altogether.” By Daily Mail math, that’s an epidemic of pound-counting gentlemen — time for another scare headline.

On the plus side, I finally looked up how much a stone is: 14 pounds! So not all is lost.

Why Putting On Just Half A Stone Will Cause Your Husband’s Eyes To Start Wandering [Daily Mail]