FLAM aka Feeling Like a Mom Is the New Teen Slang You Should Be Using

Image via A24 Films.
Image via A24 Films.

I don’t know about you, but I always end up spending my vacations behaving far less wildly than I do in my day-to-day life. During a recent trip to Iceland, a place with a population less than that of Wyoming (the least-inhabited US state), I doubled down on these low-key habits: I ate dinner at 6:30 or 7 every night. I had 2.5 glasses of wine with those dinners. Then, I got into bed. I watched a movie. I read. And I slept.

I tell you this highly personal story only to intro what I’m about to share, which is that it was on this trip that my younger sister, who keeps me hip to what the youths are doing, said something casually to me that made me stop scrolling Netflix’s latest selection of picks immediately. Luckily, there was a witness to the exchange who transcribed it for posterity’s sake:

Emma: Kate looks like she is FLAMing hard.

Kate: FLAM?

Emma: Oh, I came up with it. It means feeling like a mom.

Here is the picture that sparked this remark:

Illustration for article titled FLAM aka Feeling Like a Mom Is the New Teen Slang You Should Be Using

I mean??? Has any term been more accurate? I was hard FLAMing. I was in full FLAM mode. Reading glasses—on. Dad long underwear—set. Cuddled up in bed with an iPad while in the middle of fucking nowhere with my two small children—yes.

Anyway, this is just to say: now you have a word to describe you at your best. Enjoy. And thank my sister, who will murder me if you don’t give her props for this.

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JujyMonkey: unstable genius

Hate to break it to y’all but parents generally don’t have a leisurely dinner with 2.5 glasses of wine. Typically the wine is your dinner and you hurriedly eat a sandwich over the kitchen sink while trying to get your kids to finish their homework, clean up their room and shouting for the 20th time. “NO, YOU CANNOT WATCH ANOTHER GODDAMN EPISODE OF ADVENTURE TIME UNTIL YOU BRUSH YOUR TEETH!!”