Finally! A Lifeless Rock in the Void of Space that Women Can Enjoy!

Illustration for article titled Finally! A Lifeless Rock in the Void of Space that emWomen Can Enjoy/em!

Move over, Jennifer Aniston's stupid finger-boulder! There's a new obscenely large diamond thingy in town! According to science, there is a great big planet out in space that is kind of named canker sore, and is also MADE OF SPARKLING DIAMONDS. Ladies, I hope you have your spit-up towels handy, because you've got some drool-sopping to do!

Scientists at Yale University have discovered a nearby super-Earth that is a "diamond planet" - a planet that has a mantle made of graphite and diamond.

The planet, called 55 Cancri e, is just 40 light years from Earth and orbits the binary star 55 Cancri, which is located in the constellation of Cancer. When the planet was first observed last year, it was originally thought to be a water planet, similar to Earth, but new information has allowed the scientists to infer that the planet is much more likely to be a diamond planet.

Finally, an outer-space planet marketed to my needs! Thanks, universe!


The lady who ends up with that sparkle-planet on her finger is one lucky intergalactic giantess, I tell ya. Also, all you chocolate planets better watch out when she's got her space-menses. AMIRITEGIANTESSES!?!?!?!? Seriously.

Scientists discover nearby ‘diamond planet' [ExtremeTech]

Photo credit: sgursozlu / Stockfresh.

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Does this mean that fellas are going to start being pressured to spend two months' salary on telescopes?