Vote 2020 graphic
Everything you need to know about and expect during
the most important election of our lifetimes

Everyone Smokes Up These Days Except Obama

Illustration for article titled Everyone Smokes Up These Days emExcept/em Obama
  • Barack Obama had a meeting and a bunch of potheads showed up. Somebody told them there would be brownies. [NY Times]
  • Then the Republicans held a meeting to talk about their alternative budget and a bunch of people expecting numbers showed up and there were neither numbers OR pot brownies because the Republicans ate 'em. Jason Linkins calls that "happy hour at the Chuckle Hut." [Huffington Post]
  • Then Robert Gibbs went all Jon Stewart on them, harshing their mellow. [Washington Post]
  • And then Michelle Bachmann introduced a bill to prevent the establishment of a world currency and everyone got really pissed that the Republican leadership had bogarted all the weed. [CBS News]
  • Lacking in mind-altering substances, John McCain finally admitted everyone voted for Sarah Palin instead of him. [Washington Independent]
  • His former lead staffer Steve Schmidt came out for gay marriage but not in that way, and McCain turned to the bottle and some old Vicodin he found. [Huffington Post]
  • Sarah Palin sought to blunt Republican criticism of her plan to reject one-third of the federal stimulus money by not showing up to a meeting with Republican legislators. [Politico]
  • New York Senator Kirsten Gillibrand prefers straight nicotine to weed by, like, a lot. [NY Times]
  • Papa's got a brand-new Afghanistan strategy that includes Pakistan and doesn't make your heroin any cheaper, so stick to weed. [NY Times]

Share This Story

Get our newsletter



When I heard the President of the United States say this: "The answer is no, I don't think that [legalizing pot] is a good strategy to grow the economy," I was in the kitchen making dinner.

And I said, out loud: "Well, actually, yes, yes it would. It would help the economy. Not to mention helping Mexico deal with the violence." (Because it fucking would!)

And I was really kind of hoping that one of my elementary school-age children would ask why. But they didn't. Damn them and their not-paying-attention to Mommy's rants!