Enrique Iglesias Has Already Released This Year’s ‘Blurred Lines’ Video

Enrique Iglesias, who appears to have not aged at all since Desperado, has released a new single about being a sex addict. Or about performing cunnilingus with a fair degree of competence. Or about butts. Or about the phenomenon of sitting down and having butts shaken against one's nose. Or about having pool parties with Pitbull. Or about how disappointing it is to realize that Pitbull is just a human man with a dog's name and not a talking dog.


"I'm A Freak" follows in the age-old music tradition of objectifying women as male performers boast about their sexual prowess. It's actually a testament to how little the basic music video format has changed at all since the 90s — it's like if Hollywood had never stopped making Die Hard movies…

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Nothing says in touch with the youths of 2014 like a 38 year old man at a lingerie pool party.

Also, what do we call the opposite of a sausagefest? Because this is it. If I ever went to a gathering where my only options were Enrique Iglesias, Pitbull, a dude showing off his beer belly in a red speedo, and someone's lost grandpa I am out of there, not getting naked.