Emily Is Staying in Paris For Another Season, But What Could She Possibly Be Doing?

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Screenshot: Netflix

Emily in Paris has been renewed for a second season on Netflix, as you’ve probably heard through the collective groans of displeasure from the citizens of Paris and anyone who has actually watched the entire first, useless season. The series, which stars Lily Collins and her complete lack of acting skill, follows the titular Emily around the titular Paris as she Instagrams her way through a career—but, as she reminds everyone around her, that doesn’t make her an influencer.


Produced by Darren Star of Sex and the City fame, Emily feels like Star’s attempt to give Gen Z their own Carrie Bradshaw and certainly Emily ticks all of the Bradshaw boxes. A closet full of clashing patterns and Chanel, an undetermined amount of income, a job that doesn’t entirely make sense but seems cool in theory, and most importantly a never-explained love for Paris. It is truly a feast for the eyes that you didn’t want or need.

But the supposed allure of the show is Emily, in Paris for a limited amount of time, trying to fit in and live the Parisian lifestyle. She is the placeholder for all uncultured Americans who have never really tasted an authentic croissant and that shit gets old pretty fast. You can’t just eat pan au chocolate every morning, Emily. Boil an egg for christ’s sake. Anyway, for the most part Emily does everything in the first season that an American in Paris sets out to do. She indulges in the food, seemingly having wine or champagne at every meal, she visits the tourist spots, she fucks French dudes, and she makes a mockery out of Paris fashion week. What more is there to do in the second season?

One thing Emily should absolutely be doing in the second season is getting a handle on the French language. During the first season, she arrives at her new Paris office only able to say hello and thank you in French which makes absolutely no sense for someone who was told she’d be living in France for a year. One tourist spot Emily appeared not to visit in season one is the Louvre, although the museum is mentioned repeatedly, so I guess if Netflix has the budget to make that happen, by all means, let’s get a shot of Emily in front of the Mona Lisa. It’s most likely Emily will be spending her second season dealing with the fall-out of fucking her hot neighbor who is dating her other hot friend because as we are told several times throughout the season, “Paris is really just a small town,” and apparently everyone fucks each other. Vive la France!

But what Emily should really be doing is leaving Paris because they are about to go into a second lockdown and seeing how her job is to Instagram mattresses and vaginal douches in different parts of the city, work might be getting just a touch more difficult.


chocolate covered raisons d'être

No, Emily. You stay there. Otherwise they may be tempted to make “Emily In Denver” or “Emily In Punta Gorda” or some shit. Enjoy your baguettes.