Dove Lays Eggs On Guy's Car, He's Totally Sweet About It

When a guy named Trevor Maltby left his car at the Cairns International Airport in Australia to go on a six-day business trip, he returned to find a small bird perched on top of a tiny nest on the windshield wiper blade of his Audi hatchback. This is one of the few occurrences in life that is both A) a really good omen for future forever peace and happiness, B) extremely inconvenient when you have to drive home from the airport.

Says Maltby:

“At first I thought it was just trying to ‘blend in,’ then I noticed it looked like it was trying to make a nest. As I got closer it appeared it was not about to fly away.”

Like that scene in Bridesmaids where Maya Rudolph takes a shit in a wedding dress, in the street, the dove was like, “It’s happening. OH GOD. IT’S HAPPENING.” Meanwhile, Maltby got a co-worker to come help him try to shoo the bird politely.

“I called over a colleague who had just arrived on the same flight and got him to come have a look. … I took a picture of it sitting there, then we both tried to give it a bit of a hurry up-we could basically pet it if we wanted to- and my colleague put his hand right up to it’s face, and that’s when it raised its wings and exposed those eggs.”

Maltby could have been a dickhead. Instead, he called the local wildlife foundation and learned about doves. He shares his knowledge: “They are known for nesting in awkward places.” What a mensch.

Wildlife officials told him that they could come and relocate the nest or he could leave the car there and wait for the eggs to hatch. He offered to leave the car and got a ride home with his co-worker. However, the wildlife foundation concluded that the airport parking lot was a terrible place for them and took them to an incubator.

Maltby got his car back, and the dove will probably lay again soon. Perhaps on YOUR car. And only then will you learn what kind of person you really are.