There’s a new app called Photolift which can alter your face and body with the click, toggle, and swipe of a button. You can get a more chiseled jawline and a set of abs, a swell of fresh titties and a new set of hips, because who needs integrity when a selfie with a tinier waist can collect more likes on Instagram?
Feminism is all about women doing whatever makes them feel good with little to no self-interrogation, right? Well, no, not at all, but this appears to be the more mainstream definition at the moment, so for the purposes of this exercise, let’s go with it. So—work with me here—what if some beloved fictional Boss Ass Feminist Kweens™ had snatched waists? Thanks to Photolift, that deranged idea is possible.
My colleague Clover Hope gave us a little taste of what this would look like with the Fearless Girl statue. Observe, in a matter of seconds, this symbol of, uh, fearlessness—brought to you by an advertising firm—was Fashion Nova ready:
So Rich Juzwiak and I got to work using this transformative app to imagine these Boss Ass Feminist Kweens™ with the bodies they’ve always dreamed of. Why? Because we’re living in hell, we might as well make the most of it. Turn on “Good Form” by Nicki Minaj and enjoy.
Lady Liberty actually said, “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to get chose.”
Helga might have to appear on an episode of Botched, yes, but at least she finally got that Fashion Nova fittin’ pretty.
Love body positivity!