Doja Cat Went Off on ‘Stranger Things’ Star Noah Schnapp for Sharing DMs

Oop, a 17-year-old child actor is being taught the perils of social media blunders by none other than Grammy-winning artist Doja Cat, before an audience of 24 million fans. Just another Friday in Hollywood, baby!

This week, according to Page Six, Stranger Things actor Noah Schnapp, who plays Will Byers—a name I simply cannot read without hearing Queen Mother Winona Ryder shrieking “WILLLLLL” directly into my ear—shared a now-deleted TikTok video that contained screenshots of a private conversation with 26-year-old Doja over Instagram DM. Seeing as Schnapp was one of the breakout stars of the show, and the entire country has watched him mature from pipsqueak to fully-evolved teenager complete with a shockingly deep voice that triggers me all the way back to my high school cafeteria, the actor has garnered over 23 million followers on TikTok—which is to say that all of America is now privy to Doja’s thirst for the Mindflayer Slayer.

Doja had messaged Schnapp asking if he could tell fellow Stranger Things castmate Joseph Quinn, who plays the eccentric Dungeons & Dragons Hellfire club leader Eddie Munson on the show’s fourth season, to hit her up. Important to note here that Quinn and I have matching shag cuts, which is either embarrassing on account of me twinning with a fictional character from the ‘80s, or the hot impending plot to an OnlyFans bit.

“Noah can you tell Joseph to hit me up,” she wrote, then sent, “Wait no. does he have a gf?”

“LMAOO slide into his dms,” Schnapp responded. Doja admitted she couldn’t find his social platforms (did she even look? He’s got 5 million followers and his handle is @josephquinn), to which Schnapp sent her the actor’s Instagram account.

But Doja’s taste for scraggly hot guy masquerading as nerdy guy was already public prior to the TikTok gaffe. In May, she tweeted that “Joseph Quinn fine as shit.” So really, this was her second known attempt at shootin’ her shot.

“I think that to be fair, first let’s be chill about it. Like Noah is a kid, but, I don’t even know how old he is, but he’s not even over – like there’s no way he’s over 21,” Doja responded in an Instagram Live video on Thursday. “But when you’re that young, you make mistakes.”

Doja went on to say Schnapp was “unbelievably socially unaware and whack,” and that she felt violated by the situation. “Maybe he is, like, a whole snake. But I didn’t see him that way,” she said. “I made an assumption that he was gonna be chill about it and he went and shared information that I didn’t feel comfortable with him sharing.”

I can appreciate a woman so horny she tweets her wants and needs out to millions of people to make clear she wants to fuck (I am not not saying I do this). Was she tough on the teenager by speculating that he might be a “whole snake?” Maybe, but we love to see accountability for rising movie stars who typically go on to be entitled fuckboys, and this is probably a good way for Schnapp to learn not to violate a woman’s privacy. If a little shit shared my DM slides, I’d probably be pissed too.

Also, hi Joseph, I, too, daydream about you saving me from the Upside Down. Let me know if you ever wanna go upside down with me!!!!

• After Denise Richards and ex Charlie Sheen got into a public spat over their daughter joining OnlyFans, Richards has now confirmed that she’s “always in a good place with him.” Here’s me, sipping my tea, raising one eyebrow asking why she gotta be lying. [Us Weekly]
• Nick Cannon, father of 7, responded to the news of Elon Musk’s secret twins with one of his employees: “Right there with you.” No one told me there was a Seed Spreader Convention this week! Would’ve much preferred that you held that conference in space on a phallic rocketship so I don’t have to hear about it, but alas, I don’t make the rules. [Page Six]
• Kendall Jenner reposted ex Devin Booker’s NBA 2K23 game cover, and the internet is ablaze with rumors the former flames may be back together. I don’t think it’s out of the realm of possibility to assume they merely consciously uncoupled and are choosing to be adults about the situation. Wait, we’re talking about the KarJenner brood? Nevermind!!! [Us Weekly]
• Jake Paul is still trying to fight Tommy Fury. Can someone just knock him out already? [TMZ]
• ‘Southern Charm’ star Austen Kroll said his ex Madison LeCroy is “fucking Medusa.” I can hear the hissing! [Page Six]