Disney World and Toontown Are Not Immune to Perils of the Real World

Disney may seem like an idyllic place where cartoons aren’t imaginary and dreams do come true, but behind the brightly colored buildings lies a dark underworld. On Tuesday, Toontown was rocked by a trashcan explosion, later found to be caused by a dry-ice “bomb,” aka bottle of soda with dry ice in it. Visitors of Toontown were forced to evacuate, along with fearful residents like Roger Rabbit and Minnie Mouse, who clung to one another as officials confirmed Mickey was okay.

Not a day later, in the exotic setting of Disney World’s Animal Kingdom, a grandmother and her innocent son stepped into a Time Rover to ride into the prehistoric past when they happened upon a loaded pistol on the seat. It was later claimed by a man with a concealed weapons permit who thought he might need a gun in DISNEY WORLD.

What is going on, Disney? I thought you were the last bastion of all things innocent and sweet? When, as a 5-year-old Pakistani immigrant, I happened upon a jar of mayonnaise in Minnie Mouse’s refrigerator at her place in Toontown, I was coming from a country unaccustomed to the ways of mayo, cartoon or otherwise. It was my first brush with the American dream.

But now Disney has been sullied by crime, just like the rest of the world. The rest of the world, where instead of adorably eating chocolate chip cookies, Cookie Monster shoves a two-year-old, and instead of uniting to fight crime, Captain America and Spider Man end up kicking the shit out of each other. It’s like watching Mickey Mouse take his costume head off to smoke a cigarette: an unpleasant reality check.