Never trust a man with a soul patch, we always say. Now, this and much other tonsorial wisdom is available in handy chart form, courtesy of designer Matt McInerney. Good news for Santa: pointy beards are a-okay. [pixelspread, via BuzzFeed]
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I totally agree with the chart except for the ranking of the pencil thin mustache. I would trust John Waters with my life. Besides, how many others on that list have their own Jimmy Buffet song?
*Full disclosure: I have a full beard so my agreement may have something to do with that.