Dear Drapers: A Letter To Mad Men's First Family From Their Black Maid

Dear Drapers, Now that it’s officially up to me to take care of the house, I have a few things to say. I know I usually don’t talk, even though we all know what was going on in the Sixties.

My summer was really nice not that you asked, and I’m not looking forward to coming back into your crazy house of sex, lies, and bratty kids (thanks for popping another one out, that’s exactly what we all needed).

I think the writers are troubled and don’t really know how to address race in a smart way without it taking over the whole story. They probably think:

“The show is about Don, not black people, but let’s make Carla extra dignified and sometimes she can show the audience that she is aware of bullshit by giving little grimaces. That way Carla becomes someone who’s witnessing. She’s on the sidelines but she has the power of judgment. That’s even better! That way we can cover our race bases without it getting in the way. Kind of like the black guy in Ghostbusters.”

Oh, they think they’re so clever. Well I don’t buy that dubious explanation. I don’t want the power of judgment. I want a full plot line dammit. Maybe Roger has a butler and he and I can get together. I mean really get together, and our hot passionate love affair will bring us on a freedom ride down to Alabama where we will love each other in the sticky, sweaty Alabaman heat… and Sterling Cooper has some business down there and they do some advertising blah blah blah.