Chelsea Handler On Her Abortion: "These Are Things People Shouldn't Be Dishonest About"

In an interview in which she ranted about reality shows, Chelsea Handler revealed that she had an abortion when she was a teenager. “We need to be focusing on other things,” she told the New York Times. “We’re seeking out such grossness in human behavior and want such mindless entertainment. The Real Housewives of Atlanta and some of these other shows are just racist. Or 16 and Pregnant. Getting rewarded for being pregnant when you’re a teenager? Are you serious? I mean, that makes me want to kill somebody.” Handler went on to say: “I had an abortion when I was 16. Because that’s what I should have done. Otherwise I would now have a 20-year-old kid. Those are things that people shouldn’t be dishonest about.” [Perez, The Hollywood Gossip, The New York Times]

Chelsea Handler also says: “I don’t know if I’m going to be what people call mainstream, ever… My personality is just too obnoxious.” [NY Times]

Sad news, guys: Chris Meloni will not return for the 13th season of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. Detective Stabler is hanging up his badge. He’s left the building. Over and out. (Maybe now is a good time to watch some old episodes of Oz?) [TV Line]

Lady Gaga is a Monster Goddess on the new issue of Rolling Stone. [The Life Files]

Maria Shriver will probably file for divorce this week. [ET]

• Lauren Alaina lost her voice before the American Idol finals, and a doctor says she blew out one of her vocal cords. But it’s all worth it, because the winner of American Idol gets something awesome, like $5 billion and a seat on the White House cabinet, right? [People]
• Anna Kournikova will be the new lady who yells at people trying to lose weight on The Biggest Loser. [People]
• Hey, Usher: XYZ. [TMZ]
• Love this description: “OMG, you guys, Lindsay‘s bikini top ‘accidentally’ came off in front of a bunch of paparazzi she called to photograph her top accidentally falling off! She must be mortified!” [The WoW Report]
• The Jersey Shore kids went to Italy and all they got were these bruises, contusions and scrapes from beating each other up. Next time just get a cute magnet. [TMZ]
• Olivia Wilde and Bradley Cooper. It’s happening. [Contact Music, Page Six]
• You cannot use Kim Kardashian‘s breasts without permission. [TMZ]
• Ooh, Jane Lynch might host the Emmy awards! If you can’t have Neil Patrick Harris, she is an excellent alternative. [Deadline Hollywood]
• Madonna looks cute in her Henry Kissinger glasses! Why did she ban photographers from snapping her? [Page Six]
• At the link, check out some adorable pix of the Smith Kids hanging out with the Jackson kids. [Daily Mail]
• “Actress and mom Jessica Alba brought her baby bump before members of Congress in hopes of garnering support for the Safe Chemicals Act of 2011.” You mean she didn’t leave the bump behind? [E!]
• Whatever you do, do not look Nicki Minaj in the eyes. [ONTD]
• Nick Cannon is pissed that his twins’ birth certificates were “leaked” on line. He tweeted, “Whoever released my children’s birth certificates need they ass whooped!” Of course, informational birth certificates are public documents. But whatever. Let the ass-whooping begin. [Contact Music]
• Ed Westwick, Lord of my Loins, has been cast as Tybalt in a new film version of Romeo And Juliet, directed by Carlo Carlie. Hailee Steinfeld is Juliet, and Romeo has not yet been cast. [E!]
• LOLWUT: Ryan Reynolds/ Green Lantern Got Milk? Absurd. [Just Jared]
• “I hate that people still stereotype me as a junkie or a crackhead. Actually, these days I’m only interested in plutocrats. Like really, really rich guys. I’m determined to land one sooner or later… The thing is, I think I can be a real asset to a wealthy man… [But] I’ve developed this reputation as a crazy drug addict… Even now, in New York, my reputation is still pretty [bleep]. People still think I’m the same sad skank I was in 2005.” — Courtney Love. [Page Six]