Can Eyelids Sweat? 

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TFW your ex, The Weeknd, performs a teary, heart-rending breakup song, his voice wavering as he hits the words why can’t you wait? at Coachella on Friday, and the whole world (Twitter) is broken. Is he crying? Is it over Selena Gomez? I believe in love, and the fans are always right, so the answers are obviously yes. Others, like the Guardian, submit that the tears are sweat.


Selena! You had love in your hands!!

Just maybe text him and see if he’s okay? Just remember the alternative, okay?

Watch the extended cut here.

The Internet is laughing now, but I swear this will end up in a New Yorker review: Kanye West is writing a book on philosophy. Sometimes his gospel comes out in the form of jumbled Matrix metaphors and dancing swans, but sometimes it forces gossip media to consider why he would stage images of celebrities mimicking paparazzi photos of his wife and then delete them all. There’s lots of low-hanging fruit for a master’s thesis there (seriously)!

Here’s what Kanye has to say about it in an interview, in which Kanye interviews his celebrity interior designer for The Hollywood Reporter, which, itself, is a piece of work:

…I’ve got this philosophy — or let’s say it’s just a concept because sometimes philosophy sounds too heavy-handed. I’ve got a concept about photographs, and I’m on the fence about photographs — about human beings being obsessed with photographs — because it takes you out of the now and transports you into the past or transports you into the future. It can be used to document, but a lot of times it overtakes [people]. People dwell too much in the memories. People always wanna hear the history of something, which is important, but I think it there’s too much of an importance put on history.

The Washington Post has generously compiled a few of his stances on life over the years–time, creation, reality, power, and mostly, Kanye loving Kanye. I’ll leave the rest to the stans.

The working title is Break the Simulation.

Also, on Saturday he reactivated his Twitter, tweeted a photo of Nikes with a facepalm emoji, deleted everything, and then retweeted a “welcome back!” from Jack Dorsey.

It’s been at least four days since Blac Chyna’s 18-year-old boyfriend YBN Almighty Jay proposed on Instagram.

No word from the Chyna camp.

This is what Blac Chyna’s up to!

Britney and her boyfriend being adorable on Instagram again. This will never get old:

  • Oh for Chrissake. [The Sun]
  • Stormy Daniels’s lawyer and Donald Trump’s lawyer had a run-in at a fancy restaurant. It was disappointingly civil. [New York Post]
  • Wild and crazy photos of Gwyneth Paltrow getting off a flight mid-commute to her bachelorette party wooo. [RadarOnline]
  • I can not scrub this smug Elon Musk selfie off my brain. [Instagram]
  • A former Disney star Orlando Brown was captured by bounty hunters on Friday for failing to appear in court for allegedly abusing his girlfriend. The tape is exactly as insane as that sounds. [TMZ]
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