Dracula? Please. Frankenstein? Whatever. The Blob? As if. Everyone knows the real monster is that terrible creature known as Cable TV. Or at least that's what this vintage anti-cable ad would like you to believe.
Why the Hell Did Someone Hire a White Guy to Read an Essay That Begins 'I'm a Southern Black Woman'?
Dracula and Frankenstein are just silly stories written long ago. But ZOMBIES? They scare the living shit out of me, because really, what do you think people who eat BRAAAIIINNSSS all day smell like? There isn't a tic tac in this world strong enough to get rid of that breath.