Britney Spears wants to take a trip to the ATM. Britney Spears wants to transport to “a different universe” after sipping hot chocolate that “tastes like fudge.” And Britney Spears would also like renowned journalist Diane Sawyer to kiss her “white ass.”
It appears that the day we’ve all been waiting for has finally arrived: Spears, who was recently freed from her a debilitating conservatorship, is back on social media with a bigass microphone and a rightful vengeance for those who were complicit in her early aughts sexist media bashing. As Deuxmoi puts it, “Diane Sawyer seek shelter.”
In a now infamous interview in which Sawyer grilled Spears at 22 years old for a 45-minute primetime special, Sawyer made Spears cry, pried into her sex life, showed the singer photos of herself (looking hot and iconic), then asked, condescendingly, “What happened to your clothes?” “Do you like your voice?” And, the kicker: “Everyone always thought you had a different relationship to young girls.”
For reference, when I was 22, I was often blacked out crying sitting on a curb with bits of Del Taco’s Del combo burrito crumbling down my tank top. So the fact that Spears had to essentially hold it together whilst being interrogated in an extremely unbalanced power dynamic is pretty disgusting.
But Brit’s got this one all on her own. In the classic stream of consciousness style that has come to be synonymous with Spears’ Instagram page, Spears asks “Do we dare forget the Diane Sawyer interview in my apartment almost 20 years ago ???” WE DO NOT!
Spears, pissed that Sawyer was just as guilty of sexualizing her as every asshole on her management team (hi Jamie!!!), wants Sawyer to know that “ma’am I’m a catholic slut !!!” In the Instagram image, Spears also maintains that Jamie and friends forced her to stay inside her house after her emotional breakup with Justin Timberlake. Then, she claims her manager, unannounced, “put that woman in my home and made me talk to her on national television and she asked me if a had a shopping problem,” which she says was “pretty lame of my dad.” She adds: “I should spend a thousand dollars if I want every day of my life and she can kiss my white ass.”
Spears never asked to be the millennial’s patron saint—that label was slapped on her without her consent. And, as we know now, the pop star had zero control over the way her image was concocted by her own father. That image was drawn up with one goal in mind, which was to maximize profits at the expense of Spears’ mental health, childhood, and private life. And, in a predatory nature, Sawyer exploited that tension to shock and awe audiences, seemingly placing all of the blame for Spears’ bikini tops and sweaty belly dances on the singer, as opposed to her management and her satanic father. “You wanna join me at a mass and i can serve your husband my certificate on shopping for anonymous players ???” Idk what this means, but SICK ‘EM GIRL.
I’m proud of Brit for speaking her goddamn mind, and I’m also thrilled that this is likely just the beginning of Britney Spears’ shit list that’s been accumulating for more than twenty years. There’s sharks in the water. And then there’s Britney on Instagram. Game. On.