Boy Scouts Want to Know How Adult Members Feel About This Whole Gay Thing

Let’s all close our eyes, take a deep breath and imagine a future time when everybody has moved on from this whole homophobia thing and can accept the existence of gay people much like we accept the existence of brunettes. Kids with two moms will be considered as normal as kids with male-female parents and a new iteration of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy will be on the air only it will now be called Human Eye for Unfashionable Human People because, in the future, gender and sexual orientation are just a couple of flexible concepts that you can bend and tailor to your needs however you see fit.

Or let’s at least close our eyes and imagine a future when the Boy Scouts of America have finally gotten the fuck over themselves and decided to allow gay members because — Jesus Christ — get with the times, you khaki-clad bigots.

So what are those whippersnapper Boy Scouts up to now? Well, in light of the recent backlash against the organization over their blatant discrimination and homophobia, the BSA has begun taking steps to consider changing their policies, starting with a survey sent out to 1.1 million adult Scouts questioning how they feel about allowing gay people into the organization.

The survey, called The Voice of The Scout, is a semi-annual practice, only this year it will include questions about things like how the older members feel about lesbian den mothers and whether or not a gay Boy Scout should be denied the Eagle Scout reward because of his sexual orientation. One question asks, “Bob is 15 years old, and the only openly gay Scout in a Boy Scout troop. Is it acceptable or unacceptable for the troop leader to allow Bob to tent with a heterosexual boy on an overnight camping trip?” I don’t know — HOW MUCH DO YOU WANT THE OTHER BOYS LEARNING ABOUT KYLIE MINOGUE???

Of the potential policy change, Scouts spokesman Deron Smith told the New York Times:

“We are currently in the ‘Listening Phase,’ where the BSA’s committees engage key stakeholders for input and develop a summary report. Part of this process is to survey a variety of key stakeholders.”

You know that whole “don’t be on the wrong side of history” thing? This is going to be so embarrassing for them when this is all over.