Don't you guys love Taylor Swift? Billy Eichner does, so he wrote a song for her called "Glitter and Ribs" that fits perfectly into her signature girl-meets-boy narrative. The comedian/actor performed it on Conan on Wednesday night.

What's not to love about Swift? Eichner tells Conan that with all the evils happening in the world, "Taylor Swift is writing about the most important topic, which is what happens when your boyfriend doesn't text you back and I think that's so essential, Conan!" Well, it kind of is to some of us, okay!

Anyway, "Glitter and Ribs" (which Eichner originally composed for Funny or Die) could shoot to the top of the charts if Swift would just give it a shot. Sample lyrics: "He was a boy/ I was a girl/ What more do you need to know?/ He was a boy, he walked through the door/ He was a door walking through, boy."