Barbra Streisand's Dogs: We Miss Our Dead Clone Mom

Illustration for article titled Barbra Streisand's Dogs: We Miss Our Dead Clone Mom
Image: Instagram

Look how sad. Look how sad!

There are dog people, and then there are dog people whose dogs are clones. Barbra Streisand falls into the latter category, of course. The legendary diva recently posted an Instagram of her mythical beasts (lab-created Coton de Tulears) posed on the tombstone of that which spawned spawned them. As Streisand explained last year in a brief essay for the New York Times, she was so broken up after the 2017 death of her beloved Samantha (Sammie) that she sent some of her cells to a lab in Texas to make more Sammies. Well, the lab made so many Sammies, you would have sworn it was a Subway. Streisand kept two of the four spawn of Sammie (the runt died) and there they are, Scarlet and Violet, looking melancholy on their mom’s grave.


You may say in response to the headline of this post, “How could they possibly miss a mom they never met?” I choose to believe that clones know. They just know. And they long. Forever.

Interestingly, the one in the middle whose seeming pronounced frown suggests that she is the most broken up about this, is not one of Sammie’s asexual offspring! She is Fanny, whom Streisand took off the hands of her breeder while she awaited her test-tube puppies. But look how sad! Look how sad! I wonder if Fanny’s sad all the time for not being a special one, a clone. Is it the mustache that’s pulling Fanny’s face down, or is it something more existential? That Streisand refers to Fanny as Scarlet and Violet’s “cousin” and not sister may be telling in itself.

It just goes to show that everyone is sad, even pampered, genetically engineered dogs and their “cousins.” And then they die. But the lucky ones come back.

Some Pig. Terrific. Radiant. Humble.


Point #1: I’m a cat person, not a dog person, and this may render my opinion irrelevant.

Point #2: I love my cats dearly. When I lost my first cat, the pain and sadness I felt was excruciating. It’s been 13 years, and to this day if I think too much about it I’ll still reduce myself to tears remembering my cat. I’ve since lost others, and that emotion rings true every time, but the first one? That was like a razor blade across my heart.

Point #3: in all the years since, with all the cats I’ve had (I seem to be a stray magnet for pregnant mama cats), I’ve never once considered cloning any of my deceased cats. Granted I don’t have the finances for it, but I figure I could better honor Willow’s memory (and Bob, and Mungo Gerry, and Billie, etc) by adopting a kitty in need and giving them a loving, warm and happy home. Cloning one of my deceased pets rings of Frankenstein and Prometheus... and a bit of Pet Semetary, too.

Point #4: I completely understand why people would be loyal to specific breeds of dogs. When I was a kid our nextdoor neighbors got a cute little puppy from the point, but that dog’s head never got bigger than puppy-sized. The body was big, like 3' long without the tail, but that head was like a rolled up pair of ankle socks. Gross. So I get why people’d be loyal to dog breeds. You get a kitten, you pretty much know what the little dude is going to look like as an adult, minus some cosmetic developments.

Point #5: I had to listen to lots of Streisand growing up (my mom is a big fan), so I instinctively dislike her music. I’ve also heard she’s insufferable in real life. Now, what with the cloned pets, I find I dislike her even more.