Australian Wines Are God's Greatest Laxative

The Australian government just approved the use of sodium carboxymethyl cellulose in wine, a chemical that can prevent crystallization and cloudiness, and also acts as a laxative. The additive has already been okayed by the European Union, but it’s banned in the United States. Though, any imported wines are allowed to contain it, and consumers will have no idea because it’s not listed on packaging. A representative from the Wine Institute, the trade group for California’s wine industry, says, “I don’t think the levels that are approved for use in wine in the EU and Australia will give that laxative effect.” Well, that’s encouraging — though perhaps winemakers should be turning this property into a selling point. Americans love yogurt that makes them poop, and wine is much more delicious.

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