Screenshot: Jenny McCarthy (Facebook)

On Monday, July 16, Jenny McCarty uploaded a video taken from inside her home to Facebook, titled:

“HAUNTED! Just happened in my house! I had to look at the security tape to prove it. Ahh!!”

It gets worse from there.

In a 48-second video, McCarthy checks her reflection in the mirror of a large sitting room (beautiful curtains, btw) and then exits stage right—and then when nobody else in the room, the piano starts playing, seemingly by itself. Here, I’d like to submit my formal opinion on this to the record: NOPE.

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“Donnie. DONNIE. SOMEONE JUST PLAYED THE PIANO,” McCarthy yells from across the house to husband Donnie Wahlberg.

“WHAT?” he responds.

“SOMEBODY JUST PLAYED THE PIANO.”

“WHO?” (Oh, for fuck’s sake.)

“I don’t KNOW! Donald. Donald!” Donald mumbles off-camera. “It played, just now!”

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Are you kidding me with this shit, Jenny McCarthy? This better be some guerrilla marketing-type shit for a new home-surveillance horror movie, and if it isn’t, please do not tell me about it an another video broadcasted to me and your millions of fans. Keep me out of this. (And good luck with your haunted house!)

Update (6:05 p.m.): Thanks to a helpful commenter, I have confirmed that the piano sound in the video above is not the sound of a creepy and/or friendly ghost, but the noise a Google Home makes when it turns off and then on again.

I guess McCarthy’s house is not haunted (for now); she’s just never restarted her Google Home before. I consider this a victory, albeit a small one, for us all.