A Lot of People Just Got Married, But Not Miley Cyrus

By Bobby Finger  |  March 14, 2017 | 1:50pm
CelebritiesDirt Bag

Though the surprise weddings of unapproachable hot cool kids Alison Brie/Dave Franco and approachable hot cool kids Ilana Glazer/I Don’t Know Him may have convinced you that everyone is, in fact, married, it’s not true! Some people are still just engaged, despite the weird stuff their parents post on Instagram.

In a truly grating interview with Entertainment Tonight, 17-year-old Noah Cyrus (Miley’s little sister) revealed that approachable hot weirdos Miley Cyrus/Liam Hemsworth are NOT married, even though Billy Ray Cyrus posted a cryptic photo of Miley in a whiteish dress.

“She’s not married,” Noah said, adding that her dad was “probably just doing something fun.”

So there you have it, everyone’s married but Miley and Liam. You heard it from Noah first.

[Entertainment Tonight]

When asked if his ex-wife Angelina Jolie should stop getting tattoos inspired by (and sometimes naming) her lovers, Billy Bob Thornton said she should keep at it. “You can always cover ‘em up,” he wisely told a TMZ reporter while walking to his car in this hugely uncomfortable video.

In case you don’t remember, Angie had Billy Bob’s name tattooed on her arm while they were together, then had it covered up with coordinates leading to…her house? Dry land? The vault where she keeps all those unsold Blu-rays of By the Sea?


[TMZ]

Speaking of the Hemsworths (two blurbs ago), here’s a video of Liam’s brother Chris working out and making noises. It’s a lot.