While walking down a street in Sydney, Australia, on Wednesday evening, Kelly Osbourne was “attacked” by an unidentified bat, who then used her head as a toilet.

In a shocking photo posted to Instagram mere hours ago, the internationally famous talk show host and sworn enemy of Giuliana Rancic showed the beast’s vile excrement to the world, adding:

#FuckMyLife walked down the street to @harrysfamouspies where a fucking bat attacked me and shit on my head!


After marking its prey with a stream of goopy filth, the bat flew home, where he presumably spent the evening regaling his fellow creatures of the night with tales of his triumphant battle with the Purple-Haired One.

Some media outlets have theorized that the shitting demon was a distant relative of a bat eaten alive on stage by Osbourne’s father decades ago, which is as good of an explanation as anything, really.


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Image via Instagram.