Trump's Solution to the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict: Make It Way, Way Worse 

Welcome to another episode of “Donald, Jared, and Donald’s Company Lawyer Bring Peace to the Middle East With No Trouble Whatsoever.” Today, Trump formally recognized Jerusalem as the capital of Israel and announced plans to move the U.S. embassy there from Tel Aviv, fulfilling a campaign pledge at the cost of…

Welp, Sufjan Stevens Just Released a Song About Tragic Cultural Icon Tonya Harding

Fresh off the release of his two gorgeous original songs for Call Me By Your Name, weepy music man Sufjan Stevens has released a brand new track for the film I, Tonya, and—hmm, wait...I’m receiving word that this song, entitled “Tonya Harding,” is not actually related to the film I, Tonya at all. Their shared release…

Windsor Chapel Staff Is Watching Suits To Prepare for Royal Wedding; Meghan Markle Is Learning About Hostages

You probably have not heard that next May, Meghan Markle will marry Prince Harry at St. George’s Chapel in Windsor Castle. The event will be a who’s-who of British royalty and actors from Suits. The chapel’s Lay Stewards have been ordered to prepare by binge-watching their future princess’s show on Netflix.