Rand Paul Thinks Unmarried Poor Women Should Just Stop Having Sex

Aging Brillo pad Rand Paul has a brilliant suggestion for a weapon in his ongoing war against the terrifying dragon of the unwed single mother who won't stop living off the government: tell her that if she won't stop having kids, she doesn't get any more government benefits. Rand Paul also famously opposes giving… » 1/30/14 12:20pm 1/30/14 12:20pm

Editor Tries to Defend Stupid Comments About Single Moms, Fails

Last week, one Chris Powell, managing editor of the Journal Inquirer out of Hartford, Connecticut used his plaform to lay down some facts about how single moms are ruining journalism. Some people (us!) didn't love this poorly written screed and used their platform to say as much. Powell became "the national… » 10/07/13 5:00pm 10/07/13 5:00pm

Dumb Indiana Proposal Would Punish Pregnant Drug Addicts

Indiana's Republican Attorney General proposed a law that would require pregnant welfare recipients' benefits to be contingent on passing a series of drug tests; if they can't pass, they can't buy food. Great idea guys — what economically disenfranchised pregnant drug addicts need is some good old fashioned… » 9/26/13 12:50pm 9/26/13 12:50pm

Freeloading Kitty-Cats Living Large Off YOUR Tax Dollars in Their…

How about a change of pace? Ahem. You make me sick, you lazy socialist kitty-cats! Just lounging around Ernest Hemingway's Key West museum compound, having six toes and getting fat on government-subsidized Meow Mix like hardworking Real Americans owe you a living. Not in my America! In my America it's time for you to… » 12/14/12 3:45pm 12/14/12 3:45pm

Pennsylvania Bill Requires Low-Income Women to Prove They Were Raped in…

The more naive readers out there might think there's only one kind of rape: forced sexual penetration. Ha! There's actually a bevy of rape flavors, including "rape" rape, "grey" rape, "legitimate" rape, "forcible" rape, and — last and most recent but certainly not least — rape by divine intervention. » 10/25/12 10:25am 10/25/12 10:25am

Woman Who Didn’t Let Lottery Winnings Interfere with Welfare Benefits…

The Michigan woman who continued to collect welfare after winning $1 million (which amounte to about $735,000) in the state lottery was found dead Saturday morning in home in Ecorse, which is southwest of Detroit. Investigators say that 25-year-old Amanda Clayton died of a possible drug overdose, which is just more… » 9/30/12 11:30am 9/30/12 11:30am

Want Welfare in New Mexico? Better Be Ready to Prove You Were 'Forcibly…

Time to woefully set the giant "DAYS SINCE SOMEONE IN THE GOVERNMENT SAID SOMETHING ASININE ABOUT RAPE" sign back to 0. It seems that the state of New Mexico is trying to limit certain state aid to only women who can prove their child is the result of "forcible rape." Not that other, less awful sort of rape that… » 9/20/12 6:15pm 9/20/12 6:15pm

Legislator In Favor of Drug Testing Welfare Recipients, Not in Favor of…

Indiana Republican Jud McMillin has withdrawn his bill that proposes to test welfare recipients for the presence of illegal drugs after a Democrat in the state's General Assembly tacked on a provision in the bill that would require that legislators themselves also be tested for drugs. From this, we can safely conclude… » 1/30/12 5:45pm 1/30/12 5:45pm

Fake Pimp James O'Keefe's Dream Exposé, Exposed

Fake pimp and would-be sex boater James O'Keefe is profiled in the upcoming New York Times magazine. And one anecdote, in which O'Keefe and friends cook up a plan to expose the government's evil plan to prevent black people from marrying each other, is indicative of everything that's wrong with him. (Apart from, you… » 7/27/11 4:00pm 7/27/11 4:00pm