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Jury Finds Owen Labrie Guilty of Misdemeanor Sexual Assault, Felony Child Luring in St. Paul's Rape Case

A New Hampshire jury has returned with a mixed verdict in the trial of Owen Labrie, charged with raping a 15-year-old classmate at the elite St. Paul’s School. Labrie was convicted of one count of misdemeanor sexual assault, and one count each of endangering a child, a misdemeanor, and using a computer to lure a… » 8/28/15 2:20pm 48 minutes ago

Portland Residents Are Desperate to Find the Man Pooping All Over Their City

Portland, Oregon needs your prayers. Or, at the very least, a whole bunch of plastic bags. There is an as-yet-unidentified man roaming around the city, pooping in public places, and leaving it there for the world to see and smell. Portland residents have begun calling him “The Portland Pooper” because, honestly,… » 8/28/15 1:30pm Today 1:30pm

Today's Best Deals: Hue Bloom, Fitbit Charge, Waterproof Speaker, and More

Here are the best of today’s deals. Get every great deal every day on Kinja Deals, follow us on Facebook and Twitter to never miss a deal, join us on Kinja Gear to read about great products, and on Kinja Co-Op to help us find the best. » 8/28/15 1:15pm Today 1:15pm

Watch Amy Schumer & J.Law Perform a Power-Drawing Ritual on Billy Joel's Piano

Billy Joel, an up-and-coming singer who shows some promise, has taken a few pages out of Taylor Swift’s book and upped the profile of his most recent concert by bringing some special guest stars out to help him perform “Uptown Girl.” Those special guests were Jennifer Lawrence and a (possibly very inebriated?) Amy… » 8/28/15 1:10pm Today 1:10pm

What to Do When You Find Out a Coworker Makes More Than You Do

Aaargh. You just found out that your coworker makes more than you do, even though you both do the same kind of work, you’ve been there longer, and you do a better job. You feel demoralized, insulted by your not-such-a-great friend employer, and resentful of your coworker. Before you protest, here’s how to handle the… » 8/28/15 1:03pm Today 1:03pm

Sarah Palin Pretends to Consider Being Donald Trump's Vice President 

Take shelter: Sarah Palin, former governor and current professional bloviator, is “leaving the door open” to becoming Donald Trump’s running mate. Donald Trump has not, that we know of, asked her to be his running mate, but has said in the past that he’d tap her to be part of his blessedly imaginary—for… » 8/28/15 12:49pm Today 12:49pm

California Man Was Not Actually Human-Alien Hybrid Sent to Save Humanity

The circumstances surrounding Jeffrey Lash’s death on July 4 in a wealthy Los Angeles suburb are still unclear. Also unknown is where Lash managed to acquire the hundreds of thousands of dollars in cash and the many, many guns found in his home. However, contrary to what he told three devout followers, we can be… » 8/28/15 11:30am Today 11:30am

Chill Pope Totally Supports Banned Book About Gay Parents

Look, you can say whatever you want about our reigning Pope, but you can’t deny that the dude is a little more chill than his predecessors (especially the last one). This has been made even more evident by the fact that the last authority on anything Catholic has taken up as a supporter of a controversial children’s… » 8/28/15 10:55am Today 10:55am

Listen to Justin Bieber's New Single About an 'Indecisive' Girl

After weeks of teasing his new song “What Do You Mean” on Instagram with a countdown that included numerous famous friends (like MARTHA), Justin Bieber dropped the lyric video for the track in the wee hours of Friday morning. An homage to an apparently fickle girl, lyrics include “What do you mean?/When you nod your… » 8/28/15 10:10am Today 10:10am

Pamela Anderson Won’t Be Wearing MAC Makeup Any Time Soon

Pamela Anderson wrote a letter to MAC Cosmetics, appalled at the company’s decision to sell products in China, where animal testing is required by law for imported cosmetics. The staunch PETA activist, who has worked with MAC in the past, discovered that the brand “abandoned its celebrated policy against animal… » 8/28/15 9:30am Today 9:30am