We're only twenty-two days away from Halloween, so why haven't you started your holiday shopping yet, you lazy ass? No fear, if you happen to have legally inherited a large sum of cash recently, you might want to check out the Neiman Marcus holiday catalog for some excellent gift ideas. I kid, but I truly love this…

As it seems, there are not secret underground millionaires-only stores where the 1% does all its shopping. According to a new survey from Millionaire Corner, rich people are right there in line with you stocking up on $19 knockoff UGG moccasins at Target.

In a major shock, Beyoncé failed to make the Forbes "World's Most Powerful Celebrities" list. Oh, please, you know that's impossible — she was actually ranked number one.

Apparently rich people only like living in economically diverse areas just for kicks — that is, until they start having kids. A recent analysis of census data indicates that the wealthy are twice as likely to relocate to more affluent neighborhoods than they were in the 70s, largely owing to their budding silver…

If you are a rich person living in a Big City and the only definition of success you can picture looks like private school —> Ivy League —> hedge fund manager, then please, go read this story about ethical parenting over at New York mag, which should really be called "Things Rich People With Kids Will Relate To," and…

Today, Thought Catalog, a blog that serves as a future embarrassment machine for self-absorbed 23-year-olds who don't know any better, ran a post called "Being Privileged Is Not A Choice, So Stop Hating Me For It" (it's just as bad — NAY, WORSE — than it sounds). What follows is the only logically possible response.

These bourgeois pigs in business class must be purged from our skies. Why let them board an airplane early, free from the desperate urge to jostle for a space in the overhead bin for their sensible leather carry-on just so they can sip mimosas and sneer at the poor, corn syrup-coated plebes seated in zones 2 through…

A new "investor sentiment report" found that rich people don't actually feel like they're rich until they've amassed at least $5 million—in fact, they specifically feel "poor." Their words, not mine. Which is weird, because I sometimes feel like I'm rich when I take a cab, or if I'm home alone with leftover pie, and…

If you love pop music, have almost a grand burning a hole in your pocket, and haven't yet developed a gaydar, do I ever have the summer fun outing planned for you! A One Direction concert!

A new study of wealthy British neighborhoods has revealed a trend that most Stephen Sondheim fans already take for granted: wealthy women who “lunch” tend to booze up more in all their leisure time than their working- or even middle-class counterparts. To the sociology mobile!

If you feel like your wealthy friend is avoiding you, you might be right. New Shullman Research data shows that rich people (in this case, people who make more than $250,000/year) are less likely to want to interact with their friends and acquaintances face-to-face than us poors are and much prefer online forms of…

Well, everybody, it appears that capitalism is the answer to all problems! Okay, well, not really, but a new economic analysis authored by Betsey Stevenson and Just Wolfers has found one basic, straightforward conclusion: More money makes you happier, and you can never have too much of it. The old belief, that you can…

Call it the revenge of Quinn Morgendorffer: no matter what you end up buying the angsty malcontent in your life for the holidays, a new study has proven that their bad attitude is bound to continue in a vicious cycle. Data collected from 10,000 American teenagers by University College London and the University of…

You know how when you wear your ostrich-egg diamond necklace for your Saturday promenade down Main Street and all the drunk poors stir awake on their cardboard mats and sort of give you this really judgy scowl? Ugh, it is literally the worst, and if you're regularly besieged with the covetous stares of your less…