Old Man Sad to Learn Old Men No Longer Automatically Get Laid

BREAKING! Cranky old man confronted by an idealized male physique in the form of Daniel Craig's James Bond, experiences hurt feelings over the fact that the universe doesn't revolve around his self esteem, writes whole big column about it. A waahmbulance has been called to the scene. » 11/27/12 3:50pm 11/27/12 3:50pm

Miserable Troll Ann Coulter Forced to Cancel Speaking Engagement…

It was, apparently, the "retard" heard round the world. After sending a terribly stupid, ill-advised Tweet congratulating Mitt Romney for going easy on "the retard" (the retard being the President — GOD ANN YOU ARE SO EDGY. ANY N-WORDS UNDER YOUR HAT?), people started to sour even more on Coulter's idiocy vanguard… » 10/26/12 12:20pm 10/26/12 12:20pm

Cabin Fever Is Serious Business

God shat on Chicago this week, blessing us with more than 20 inches of powdery white misery and two days of citywide chaos. In the blizzard's wake is only the misery and claustrophobia known as cabin fever. Suffer with me. » 2/05/11 2:05pm 2/05/11 2:05pm