Drake's Penis Is 'Weird, Thin, and Pointy,' Says Future Shakespeare

Today is the day that I read several conflicting accounts about the shape of Drake's celebrity penis and what he likes people to do or not do with his butthole while he touches said controversially shaped penis. Today is also the day that I realized that every other non-today day of my life has been wasted. » 7/14/14 8:00pm 7/14/14 8:00pm

Go Deep Inside a San Francisco Vibrator Factory

For all the mystique surrounding the female orgasm, vibrators are a surefire way for lots (and lots) of ladies to get off. I recently took a tour of Crave, a sex toy company that prototypes and fabricates its products in San Francisco; here's a peek inside your new favorite mini pleasure machine. » 2/14/14 3:38pm 2/14/14 3:38pm

Uh, What the Hell Is a Third-Level Orgasm?

Obviously, I'm aware of orgasms. I know there are different kinds. There are the orgasms other people give you, and the orgasms you give yourself. There are the varying delivery methods of orgasms, involving actual people parts or vibrating substitutes. There are the ones that sneak up on you, and the ones you have to… » 1/22/14 1:40pm 1/22/14 1:40pm

Human Innovation Has Yielded Bluetooth-Connected Vibrating Pantyliner

Like a diminutive, pantyliner-shaped version of the obelisk from 2001: A Space Odyssey, the latest in wearable tech has appeared upon our horizon, leaving us shrieking and jumping in place confusedly. It's called the OhMiBod Remote App, and it's a vibrator that connects, via Bluetooth, to your smartphone. » 1/08/14 5:30pm 1/08/14 5:30pm

The Scariest Sex Toys We've Ever Seen [NSFW]

Earlier this month, we showed you the most precious vibrators around, ranging from snooty lint rollers to feathered rubber duckies. Now we're going the other way: here are the creepiest sex toys we could find. To each her own, even if your own is a scorpion climbing out of a coffin or a (literally) shit-talking… » 7/27/13 5:00pm 7/27/13 5:00pm

Vibrator Races in Vegas Prove That People in Vegas Are Bored

There’s a new racket in Vegas, the city where there just aren’t enough bad decision to be made. Sex toy races, whereby four battery-powered dildos crawl across a tabletop at a speed so slow that participants can feel themselves traveling backwards in time to the moment they decided they’d have a lark and put money… » 5/03/13 10:00am 5/03/13 10:00am

Are You Eco-Conscious Enough to Get Off on a Hand-Cranked Vibrator?

As an April Fools prank, high-class sex toy company Lelo tweeted that they'd soon be distributing an eco-friendly vibrator made of recycled wood pulp and old tires. Foolishly, the fool public believed them. Fools! And not only did the fool public believe them, they were falling over their Toms to shove Mother… » 4/25/13 11:10am 4/25/13 11:10am

This Vibrator/Flash Drive Will Send You to Ecstasy and Store Your…

From San Francisco, the sex and technology capital of the United States, which I can say because I live here and I am the apex of both sex and technology, comes a combo vibrator/flash drive that will both get you off and hold an entire season of Arrested Development! Technology, you're the greatest. » 12/20/12 9:15pm 12/20/12 9:15pm

Brookstone Is Getting a Lot Less Coy About Being in the Sex Toy Business

If Brookstone was one of the many of catalogs crowding your inbox this holiday season, you might have noticed that among the pages selling electronic wine openers, heated slippers, and remote control toy helicopters, the gadget chain's infamous selection of "personal massagers" has expanded to include a large… » 12/11/12 5:10pm 12/11/12 5:10pm

Reverse-Engineered ‘Sonar’ Vibrator Is the Very Latest in Vagina…

Thanks to a Scanlime post from entitled "Hacking My Vagina", there are now detailed instructions on how to reverse engineer a remote control vibrator so that its remote interface can be supplanted by an "Arduino-based sonar controller" that a user can activate with any part of her body. Vibrator deconstructionist… » 11/25/12 1:30pm 11/25/12 1:30pm