Did you for one second think that we didn't live in a bizarro circus world where the less-famous parents of very famous people go on television to accuse each other of exhibiting violent behavior and being addicted to cocaine? Well, that's your mistake because as it turns out, that is the exact bizarro circus world…
Because you were waiting with bated breath for Serena Williams' thoughts on the Steubenville rape case: she thinks the 16-year-old who was raped by two high school football players who "did something stupid" shouldn't have gotten so drunk. She's also concerned about the girl's virginity.
In a psychological study commissioned by Marissa Cooper and the ghost of Sylvia Plath, researchers at Texas Christian University have found that dwelling on reminders of daddy's psychological or physical absence makes women more likely to have depraved harlot thoughts.
"Finally, There's a Pinterest For Guys," said some sad soul in www.reddit.com/r/MensRights, probably.
If you're having trouble with the ladies, one great thing to do is to produce a gigantic musical whine-a-thon with high production values, thoughtful staging, and mildly amusing stunt casting, and then wait for it to go viral. Then all the women on earth will know that you're the kind of stand-up gentleman who…
Shale oil formations in the pastures of North Dakota have been reining in men across the country with labor-intensive work and high paying salaries (some men make up to six figures), but the promise of work has had an interesting and unique side effect on the small, remote oil towns. Basically, there are too many men,…
God, you know what I hate about intact, living female bodies? YAP YAP YAP YAP YAP YAP YAP. It's like, can't you bitches see I'm trying to play my open-world action role-playing game right now!!?!?!?? Amirite, dudes? Seriously. But then—conundrum!—the thing about female bodies is that female bodies is where they keep…
There's no story recycled by mainstream rom-coms and commercial literature more frequently than that of the uppity, cerebral woman being put in her place (and happily!) by a dude who can't spell. Case in point: The Ugly Truth was on about three times in a row last night! Thank you, but I would rather drink battery…
While you were sleeping (shortly before 2 A.M. in the morning!), the lame-duck legislators in Michigan's House of Representatives passed HB 5711 by a 72-35 vote. HB 5711 is also known as:
The Michigan Senate just voted to pass HB 5711 — one of the country's most extreme and wide-reaching anti-choice measures, which is really saying a lot — by a 27-10 vote, with immediate effect. They added some revisions, which means the bill has to return to the House (which will probably approve it quicker than you…
Sure, why not? When you're an avid supporter of legislation that drives women to perform violent surgery on their own uteruses using wire coat hangers, what better place to spread your scribbly-crayon-font message of love than on those very same coat hangers? Killer plan. Know your audience, guys!
This is Fuck You Week, Jezebel's first annual week of desperate emotional cleansing and unhinged psychic purging.
We all know you're not supposed to shoplift, and even so, it's probably something most people have done at some point in our lives. Whether it's slyly slipping an Urban Outfitter's bespeckled owl necklace into your purse or stealing formula to feed your baby, I'm not here to argue the moral ambiguities of the…
At first, Facebook was irrelevant. I didn't get it. Why did I need Facebook when I could post all the Blingees I wanted on my friends' MySpace walls? This shit is obviously dumb. But then, somehow, seemingly overnight, Facebook became ubiquitous. Lively. MySpace was static, stagnant garbage. Facebook was fun and…
You guys. I am so, so sorry in advance about the information I am about to present to you. But, I mean, do you expect me to just process it alone? All by myself? What of the social contract!?!?
There are already so many reasons for Arizona to be beaming with pride. They hardly needed another feather in their cap, but it looks like they've got one anyway: a mother in Phoenix was arrested earlier this week after she put beer in her son's sippy cup while they were eating at a local pizza place.
Infant rapper Kitty Pryde
The first time I tried to load the #replacebandnameswithrape hashtag, my computer browser warned me that the page contained insecure content. "Insecure" doesn't even begin to describe it. I'd be offended if I wasn't so depressed. You know people fought in wars to protect our freedom of speech, right? And this is how…
You probably already knew that when you flush the toilet with the lid open, a great big cloud of bacteria shoots up into the air like a mushroom cloud of poo germs. But did you know that if you leave the lid open even when the toilet is just hanging out and not being shat in, you're exposing all nearby surfaces to a…
Before I proceed to rip apart what's got to be the worst clothing item I've seen since the Forever Lazy, I have an admission to make: I love jeggings. I think they're comfortable and I wear them nearly every day. (I would never wear them in the place of jeans, or pretend they're not what they are.) That said, what in…
Here's another tale for your collection of airline discrimination horror stories. British Airways has apologized after refusing to sell a ticket to a girl with Down syndrome. Her mother, Heather Saunders, wanted to send her 12-year-old daughter Alice to visit her aunt, so she called the airline and asked if she could…
Just in time for Valentine's Day: a big fleece pillow that you can customize with the name of a date rape drug. Is the uncanny valley stock photo model included, or does that cost extra? Also, how much does it cost to ship a pillow to Chicago from the video for Black Hole Sun?
Kayla Watkins, 12, was fine with being the only girl on a boy's hockey team — til she saw a meeting agenda item about her "Player Ability Limitations," including handwringing over her locker room changing, written by another kid's dad.
As if we didn't already believe they were the worst people on earth, the hatemongering Westboro Baptist Church says it will picket a "respectful distance" from Elizabeth Edwards' funeral, while spewing all sorts of bile against her.
In case you were wondering, Bret Michaels was always a royal dickwad. These pictures—probably NSFW—are the proof:
As Stephanie Hallett of Ms. points out, Axe's latest bodywash campaign promises to "scrub away the skank," a tagline used after showing a picture of a woman's face, an alarm clock, and a man lounging in bed. Classy as ever!
The editors of the Johns Hopkins News-Letter apparently decided it would be a great idea to start the school year by celebrating misogyny and sexism, posting two heinous articles that center around drinking and "fat chicks."
[Here's Paris Hilton's booking photo from earlier today. Las Vegas, August 28. Image via AP.]
I'm pretty sure that the woman in this vintage ad isn't actually yelling Lane Bryant's heinous old copy. What do you think she's really saying? [Vintage Ads]
