We Don't Need This Severed Penis Eggplant Emoji Movie
Have you heard there’s going to be an Eggplant Emoji movie? Oh, no? Well, there is one. It’s about a severed dick.
Blac Chyna Accuses Rob Kardashian of Domestic Violence After He Posts Series of Abusive Instagrams
On Wednesday morning, Rob Kardashian’s Instagram account abruptly transitioned from adorable photos of the reality star and his seven-month-old daughter Dream to a barrage of explicit nudes, cheating allegations, and other vitriol directed at his sometimes-fiancé Blac Chyna.
That Story About Taylor Swift Voting for Trump Is So Very False
If like a huge number of Americans you get your news from social media, you’re likely to have seen a story this week claiming that pop star Taylor Swift is a proud Trump supporter. The report is completely fabricated—as is the image of Swift wearing a “Make America Great Again” hat.
Italy's 'Fertility Day' Reminds Women That They Are Vessels for Babies
In an attempt to combat Italy’s rapidly declining birthrate, the Italian government declared September 22 to be “Fertility Day,” with a campaign that backfired tremendously.
Which Tech Startup Is Trying to Throw an Office Stripper Party?
It’s no secret that tech companies sometimes breed a frathouse office culture. Palantir—the Peter Thiel-cofounded data firm, for example—is no stranger to beer pong, drunken injuries, or merciless pranks. But debauchery must have its limits. No one would be stupid enough to throw a stripper party in their own office,…
xoJane Deletes a Post Ribbing DNC Flack [Updated]
The hacked DNC emails have thus far provided an abundance of mostly non-revelatory riches, though some nuggets have been more useful than others. However, because tone and intent are often lost in translation, they’re also apparently easy to misinterpret, as xoJane discovered earlier today.
Sheesh, There's a Reason Women Are 'Totally Crushing It' at the Confessional Essay
It’s not a good reason, either!
My Least Favorite A Cappella Group Covered My Favorite A Cappella Song & I'm So Mad
Despite what our resident a cappella expert Ellie Shechet will have you believe, I am not a unilateral hater of a cappellas—only the corny ones. A song I listen to at least three to eight times a year, for instance, is the a cappella version of Monica’s “Sideline Ho,” which uses gospel harmonies to elevate a seething…
JebBush.Com Redirects to Donald Trump's Website, Which Seems About Right
We were just getting over the saddest sight of all time, Jeb Bush trying to chest-bump someone, and the second saddest sight, his facial expression immediately after promising to “whup” Hillary Clinton. And now this: JebBush.com currently redirects to DonaldJTrump.com.
People Are Pissed at Cosmopolitan for Calling the Kardashians 'America's First Family'
Ok, so. Out of all the myriad worldwide injustices readily available for consumption via the reading device of your choosing, we have elected to be outraged about a trolly editorial decision made by Cosmopolitan magazine. The print edition.
Misty Copeland Came to Our Office & We Gave Her Trash
Misty Copeland came to our office and we gave her trash.
What the Heck Is Going on With Instagram and Soundcloud Right Now?
Some questions: Why does SoundCloud, sweet cloudpunk tweenrave trap-remix oasis, have ads all up in my ear now? Why does Instagram have a “@music” channel and a @music editor and a plan to roll out @music longform Instagrams and a goddamn Monthly Hashtag Project? This is going to be an anti-explainer, because there is…
Ugh to This LOFT Ad About Frantically Binge-Exercising in Saran Wrap
Yeah, yeah, we all had a lot of cookies this past month and now maybe your clothes don't fit right. Or maybe they do. Or maybe you don't give a fuck? Whatever the case, January is always a big month for "Feel bad about yourself you ugly cow"-style advertising. Clothing retailer LOFT just added another one on the pile,…
Jet Blue Apologizes After Refusing to Let Toddler Use Restroom
Not a great week for 3-year-olds.
Joe The Plumber to UCSB Parents: Dead Kids Don’t Trump Gun Rights
Samuel Joseph Wurzelbacher, better known as Joe the Plumber, has some choice words for those parents who lost their children at the hands of the UCSB gunman.
Tennessee's 'Religious Viewpoints' Bill is a License to Bully
Tennessee joins Oklahoma in passing a new piece of legislation which will basically allow the bullying of students by other students based on religious grounds. Texas, yeehaw, already has such a law.
'World's Toughest Job' Viral Video Is Obvious, Manipulative and Stupid
At this point, if anyone on the internet tells me that a video is going to "blow my mind," or that I need to "wait for it," or that I should prepare to "change the way I think," I immediately want to run an ultra-marathon down an abandoned mine shaft and into the earth's molten core. I despise a "big reveal." How dare…
Breaking: Annoying Rich People Feel "Deep Affinity" for Africa
The New York Times ran a fairly exasperating piece about Matthew Mellon and Nicole Hanley Mellon's lifestyle-infused clothing line. (If you don't know these people, don't even worry about it—I'm not even sure if working class are supposed to know about these things.) Anyway this gruesome twosome plan to make their…
Girl Eats Her Own Body Weight in Ketchup EVERY Year
We all have weird food habits. I know one girl who eats french fries with a fork and salad with her hands. I know another who eats hummus with a spoon when she doesn't gave pita bread or baby carrots and another still whose favorite snack is apple slices layered with cheddar cheese. (PSYCH, ALL OF THESE GIRLS ARE ME.)…
College Gals Should Make Husband-Hunting Their Major, Says Idiot
I don't know about you, but I get ALL my relationship advice from the Wall Street Journal. So boy was I jazzed about today's Valentine's Day op-ed, titled, "A Little Valentine's Day Straight Talk"! Finally, somebody's going to give it to me straight!
