Donald Trump Won't Rule Out an Independent Campaign, Even After Pledging Not To Run

Donald Trump’s waterfall of regurgitated chatter continued on Sunday, with quips about Muslim databases, 9/11, and bringing back water-boarding. And over all of it, he also suggested that he would run for president as independent if he doesn’t get the Republican nod. »11/22/15 12:05pm11/22/15 12:05pm


Bernie Sanders Reaches Peak Bernie Sanders in Incredibly Charming Ellen Appearance

In just two minutes, Bernie Sanders tells America: what the name of his Ben & Jerry’s flavor would be (“Burn Bernie Burn,” he says, misspeaking); if he’s ever been in handcuffs (“Yes,” he says, “though I don’t know exactly what you mean by that”); who’s got better hair, him or Trump (“That goes without saying”); who… »10/15/15 6:10pm10/15/15 6:10pm

Donald Trump Says He's Always 'Felt' That He's Been in the Military (He Hasn't, Actually)

Presidential frontrunner Donald Trump says in a new book that even though he wasn’t ever technically “in” the military, he feels like he was, because his parents sent him to a very expensive military boarding school when he was a teen shithead with out-of-control behavior problems. That’s sort of like insisting that… »9/08/15 12:30pm9/08/15 12:30pm

Jimmy Kimmel Got Josh Groban to Sing a Bunch of Donald Trump's Tweets 

Last night, Jimmy Kimmel Live got Josh Groban to stop by and lend his classically trained voice to Donald Trump’s sublime Twitter musings. Enjoy the new spin on such old Trump classics as “I have never seen a thin person drinking Diet Coke” and “@BarackObama’s birth certificate is a fraud.” »8/18/15 10:00am8/18/15 10:00am

Call Donald Trump's Cell Phone and Ask Him About His Important Ideas

Last month, American reality show entertainer turned American political system entertainer Donald Trump publicized presidential rival Sen. Lindsey Graham’s cell number, urging his supporters to “try it.” In the spirit of open and fair political debate, we now bring you Trump’s number. »8/03/15 1:41pm8/03/15 1:41pm

Men of The Daily Show Jizz In Their Pants Over Trump Presidential Bid

Jon Stewart only has a few weeks remaining in his tenure as host of The Daily Show. But an old friend will be there to help ease the transition: Donald Trump, who ought to stick around the presidential race just long enough for a few goodbye segments at the expense of good old Fuckface von Clownstick. »6/17/15 10:10am6/17/15 10:10am

Stephen Colbert Invites Donald Trump to Gargle His Balls For Charity

After Donald Trump's much-hyped October Surprise turned out to be an offer of $5 million to the charity of President Obama's choice if only the Commander-in-Chief would release his college transcripts, college applications, and passport applications to Donald Trump's satisfaction, Stephen Colbert had his own… »10/25/12 12:00pm10/25/12 12:00pm

It was unclear last week why real estate developer, diamond jewelry designer, and Celebrity Apprenti
It was unclear last week why real estate developer, diamond jewelry designer, and Celebrity Apprentice 2 »10/20/08 12:20pm10/20/08 12:20pm star Ivanka Trump started a new blog advocating brown-bagging your lunch in these hard economic times. But, it was revealed today that Trump's new found passion for blogging about frugal lunchtime choices actually…