Jezebel
jezenomics
Posts Tagged “
Toys
”
jezenomics
My Virtual Boyfriend
Don't you wish your dreamboat boyfriend whispered sweet nothings in your ear every time you saved your pocket change? Well the Japanese have (once again) created a solution to a problem we didn't know we had: The Handsome Man Bank. The piggy bank (or Ikemen in Japanese) has a selection of 5 different cartoon hunks who whisper romantic phrases when a person adds money (ex: "Can I rub your shoulders?"). And though the $75 contraption also doubles as an alarm clock, it does not vibrate in any way, making it totally useless in terms of actually satisfying single gals. [Inventor Spot]
myth busters
What's The Deal With The Relationship Between Girls And Unicorns?
After a one-horned deer popped up in Italy this week, girls (us included) have delighted at the idea that this genetic flaw was proof of a real live unicorn. So what is it exactly about unicorns that intrigues little girls so much? Time has come out with a story on the history of the unicorn (or, rather, the folklore surrounding the mythical creature) that was very enlightening:
The unicorn both came to represent Christ, and also began to represent purity and chastity. The idea that unicorns could only be tamed by virgins became a widely held belief, and images of unicorns resting their heads in chaste womens laps, with not so subtle sexual undertones, began to appear in artwork.
Heh. Funny then, that one of my favorite unicorn novelty items has nothing to do with chastity at all.
More »
toy story
Will The Cone Make You Moan?
I've been hearing about The Cone—a futuristic-shaped vibrator that you would expect characters in Woody Allen's Sleeper to use—for well over a year now. I'm always a little wary of high-end and low-end vibes, the former because the price tag is usually indicative of a lot of hype, and the latter because the because the price tag is usually indicative of a flimsy product with an inferior mechanism. The Cone will set you back a whopping $130. But it's cool looking. And has little light on it. And it's pink. So how did The Cone shape up? More »
UK-based sex toy company LoveHoney has announced the launch of the UK Sex Toy Awards. But instead of a "panel of experts" deciding on what the best sex toys are, LoveHoney is looking for 20 laywomen (heh, "lay") to test out the company's top 10 best sellers and then rate them. (You can apply to be one of those women here.) The winner will be announced in September. [LoveHoney via AVN]
toy story
The Mary Mermaid: Is This Dual-Stimulation Sex Toy Hot, Or Just A Cold Fish?
I definitely have more of a "type" when it comes to sex toys than I do when it comes to men. Maybe that's because there's just this one specific need that a sex toy needs to live up to, so I tend to be unyielding in my bias toward certain kinds of toys. For instance, I've always been into clit stimulation, meaning that I don't even bother to fuck with dildos that don't also vibe. Actually, I usually stay away from penetration during a normal masturbation sesh, which means that I almost never fuck with dildos at all. But in my never-ending quest to find at least one toy that could match the utter awesomeness of the Hitachi Magic Wand, I decided to open myself up, so to speak, to a dildo (a vibrating one). After the jump, the Mary Mermaid takes a dive into my vagina. More »
To celebrate the release of the Sex and the City movie, UK sex toy company Love Honey is releasing a vibrator in the spirit of the film. It's gonna be called Mr. Big. Ouch! [The Sun]
bad seeds
Earlier: Teenage Tourette's Sufferers Say What's On Their Minds
Wife Swap: Little Angels With Dirty Mouths
Most episodes of Wife Swap feature one strict family and one lenient family for purposes of creating drama. The strict families tend to be uptight about most things, but on last night's episode, the mother of the strict family, Terry, was revealed to be a saleswoman for "romance enhancements" (she sells vibrators and lube to women at parties). And although she has a somewhat dirty career for an average suburban mom, she despises dirty language — particularly when spoken by children. Such was the case with Autumn, the 10-year-old little girl in the family that sex-toy-shilling Terry is mothering for two weeks. The kid is either a comedic genius or an evil psycho. You decide from the clip above.Earlier: Teenage Tourette's Sufferers Say What's On Their Minds
toy story
The NEA: Is This "Luxury" Vibrator Worth It?
I'm not opposed to spending big money on sex toys, because I can't really think of anything that I value more than my orgasms. For a while now, I've found myself intrigued by companies that shill "high end" vibrators, claiming they are "as pleasing to the eye as to the touch." Now, I don't really give a crap about the way a sex toy looks because I'm not trying to impress anyone with it except my clitoris... and my clit doesn't have eyes. But I was super-excited to get a review sample of one of the fancy vibes — from Swedish company LELO (an acronym for Luxury Erotic Lifestyle Objects) — so I could discover if my opinion of the product would be as high as its price tag. After the jump, my clit and I weigh in. More »
pot psychology
"If You Really Like A Guy Should You Wait To Bang Him?"
When we filmed our 420 episode of Pot Psychology with Street Carnage's Gavin McInnes, we went all out to get in the right state of mind for the special event. Actually, we sorta went overboard. By the end of the night I puked, Rich was ready to hide in my bedroom, and Gavin had a paranoid delusion that Betty the intern thought he was gonna rape her. But in between all that, we managed to film nearly four hours of rambling nonsense that was just too good to confine to one episode, so this week's Pot Psych is part 2 of that epic night, in which we answer questions about hummers, midgets, and the dangers of senior citizens masturbating. Got a burning question? Send it to tips@jezebel.com with "Pot Psychology" in the subject line. (Please keep them short; they're verrrry hard to read when stoned.)
The product to the left: Workout equipment or sex toy? (Click image for answer.)
toy stories
Barbie Sales Flatten Worldwide -- Are Bratz & Miss Bimbo To Blame?
Several financial news outlets are discussing Mattel's falling first-quarter results, and most place the blame squarely on the slim shoulders of a certain doll named Barbie. Barbie, which was introduced in 1959, is now first-runner-up for the under-12 set, in part because of competition from edgier, increasingly-popular brands like Bratz and Hannah Montana dolls and in part because of the emergence of web-based toys. According to Portfolio, "Children want Web-based toys, and they want them at younger and younger ages" the magazine cites the success of interactive toys like Webkinz, and let's not forget the potential pleasures of Miss Bimbo). But the real reason Portfolio believes that Barbie is no longer the reigning beauty queen in toy world is because "at 49, Barbie is becoming obsolete." More »
pot psychology
"My Roommate Is Bulimic. What Should I Do?"
In this very special 420 episode of Pot Psychology, Rich and I are joined by a magical guest: Jambi the genie! (A virtuoso portrayal by StreetCarnage.com's Gavin McInnes.) He gave us aid(s) in tackling life's everyday issues, including dildo chew toys for dogs, Mormon weddings and large black cocks. Got a burning question? Send it to tips@jezebel.com with "Pot Psychology" in the subject line. (Please keep them short; they're verrrry hard to read when stoned.)
clips
Earlier: South Park Takes A Trip To Heavy Metal
Sci-Fi For Women: Marrying Your Vibrator
Remember that South Park episode that spoofed that sci-fi, fanboy-jerk-off-material movie Heavy Metal? Here's a clip from the original, in which a woman has sex with a robot and decides to get married to it after "experiencing ecstasy with mechanical equipment." It's kinda NSFW due to naked cartoon breasts.Earlier: South Park Takes A Trip To Heavy Metal
toy stories
How Do You Dispose Of Broken Vibrators?
A story on Utne about "green" sex toys the other day got me wondering: how exactly does one get rid of a sex toy? Particularly the large ones, meant for those who mean business? I used to have a humongous Dr. Scholl's personal massager that my ex-BF's mom gave him for Christmas one year after he started weight-training. (Weird, I know.) Naturally, I called dibs on it and used it as my main vibe for years, long after we'd broken up. Then, one day, it started sparking, turned black, and conked out so I ripped the cord out of the wall, in fear that it might start a fire. When I walked it out to the kitchen and stepped on my trashcan pedal to throw it out, I realized that the vibe was almost as long as the garbage. (I'm not kidding, I measured it and it was a little over 18" long.) And then it hit me: maybe I should be put it out on the curb on the "large electronics and metal" recycling day. As a substantial piece of machinery, it seemed like it qualified! More »
tweenage wastelands
New Game Encourages Young Girls To Embrace Their Inner "Bimbo"
There's a new game in England and France for girls ages 9 to 16, and it's so raunchy it makes Bratz dolls look positively Pollyanna-ish. Called "Miss Bimbo", the game is essentially an online competition in which each registered player is given a "Bimbo" all her own to take care of — sort of like those Tamagotchi pets, but, well, not. According to Miss Bimbo rules, the goal of the game is to make your Bimbo the " the hottest of hot Bimbos," which involves dating "that famous hottie," becoming a "socialite and skyrocket[ing] to the top of fame and popularity," and even resorting "to meds or plastic surgery", because girls should "Stop at nothing to become the reigning bimbo!" According to CNN, "Breast implants sell at 11,500 bimbo dollars and net the buyer 2,000 bimbo attitudes, making her more popular on the site." More »
Bowwow Wow
Another fun, kooky Japanese gadget to covet: "Oshaburi" toys are kind of like pacifiers for your pet. They're chew toys, but with funny mouths on one side, turning your Lab into a Looney Toon. Four different designs, hours of fun. Unless you have one of those dogs who destroys everything. Then it's more like 3 minutes of fun. (Click to see more pictures.) [InventorSpot]
Another fun, kooky Japanese gadget to covet: "Oshaburi" toys are kind of like pacifiers for your pet. They're chew toys, but with funny mouths on one side, turning your Lab into a Looney Toon. Four different designs, hours of fun. Unless you have one of those dogs who destroys everything. Then it's more like 3 minutes of fun. (Click to see more pictures.) [InventorSpot]
Plastic & Fantastic
Did you celebrate yesterday? It was Barbie's birthday! Launched in 1959, Barbie was controversial from the beginning: She was one of the first dolls for little girls with breasts, and her proportions (36 inch bust, 18 inch waist) were rather unrealistic. (Her waist was widened in 1992.) Author Peggy Orenstein, who's written extensively about issues affecting girls, tells NPR, "You either see her as the embodiment of oppressive, Teutonic standards of beauty, or you see her as all that is good and sweet and innocent about your childhood. But you can't not have a relationship with Barbie." (Like many, we like to torture her.) Still, with Bratz and Strutz and whatnot, Barbie seems downright pretty and old-fashioned these days. And homegirl looks good for 49. [NPR, Babble]
Did you celebrate yesterday? It was Barbie's birthday! Launched in 1959, Barbie was controversial from the beginning: She was one of the first dolls for little girls with breasts, and her proportions (36 inch bust, 18 inch waist) were rather unrealistic. (Her waist was widened in 1992.) Author Peggy Orenstein, who's written extensively about issues affecting girls, tells NPR, "You either see her as the embodiment of oppressive, Teutonic standards of beauty, or you see her as all that is good and sweet and innocent about your childhood. But you can't not have a relationship with Barbie." (Like many, we like to torture her.) Still, with Bratz and Strutz and whatnot, Barbie seems downright pretty and old-fashioned these days. And homegirl looks good for 49. [NPR, Babble]
