Big Brother Has Enormous Plastic Boobs: 'Hello Barbie' Can Spy on Kids

The Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood—a children's privacy advocacy group—released a petition today calling for Mattel to cease production of Hello Barbie, an "interactive" doll created in the hopes of reviving the toymaker's stumbling brand. » 3/11/15 7:10pm 3/11/15 7:10pm

Is There Anything More Terrifying Than the New York Toy Fair?

Every year, toymakers gather in New York City to showcase their latest wares. Sure, yes, many are quite spiffy. But there's always a few items that make me frankly afraid to walk into a Toys 'R Us. » 2/19/15 3:50pm 2/19/15 3:50pm

Marvel Has A Serious Problem Merchandising Its Female Characters

In between marketing winding up for its May release and Toy Fair around the corner, merchandise for Age of Ultron has been showing up everywhere. But one Avenger has been largely absent: Black Widow. It's not something new to Marvel — and that's starting to be a problem. » 1/27/15 2:35pm 1/27/15 2:35pm

Kids React to The Sheer Terror That is Teddy Ruxpin

Remember when Santa brought your friend Julie a Teddy Ruxpin for Christmas and didn't bring you shit and when you talked to Julie about it she said "well maybe Santa just loves me more" and you had to tell that little brat that actually Santa doesn't exist and she's just a spoiled little monster? Anyway, watch some of… » 1/21/15 6:10pm 1/21/15 6:10pm

Sexy Bratz Dolls Get Gentle Make-Unders Courtesy of Tasmanian Artist

The hyper-sexualization of children's toys (especially Bratz Dolls) make many of us very uncomfortable. In fact, when a new Bratz movie came into the video store I worked in once, a custome legitimately asked if it was a new animated porno he could rent. So these make-unders done by a Tasmanian artist who "rescues and… » 1/19/15 7:45pm 1/19/15 7:45pm

You Think Play-Doh's Dil-Doh Was Bad? These Toys Are Much, Much Worse

"Hey, where'd that kid get a Hitler doll?" "Why are you shaving a baby?" "PUT DOWN THAT GRENADE THIS INSTANT!" » 12/31/14 4:35pm 12/31/14 4:35pm

Play-Doh Ruins Childhood With Dick-Shaped 'Extruder' Toy

Parents are hopping mad about a Play-Doh accessory that sounds and kind of looks like a very uncomfortable plastic dildo. What, the parents wonder, are they supposed to tell their kids when they ask why the toy is shaped like a big hard dick with an honest-to-goodness coronal ridge? Won't somebody thing of the… » 12/30/14 12:10pm 12/30/14 12:10pm

This Screeching Toy Giraffe Is the Stuff of Children's Nightmares

What the hell is this? I mean, yes, it is obviously some manner of animatronic toy giraffe that screeches horribly, curdling your blood, then walks slowly and with great determination towards its own doom. » 12/09/14 9:30pm 12/09/14 9:30pm

Little Girl Fights Gendered Toys One Look of Disgust at a Time

The toy aisle, as we've discussed many times, is so thoroughly divided by gender it's like walking onto the set of some heavy-handed Star Trek episode about the folly of prejudice. Well, one store is a little less stereotype-driven today, thanks to one little girl's very annoyed face. » 11/24/14 6:10pm 11/24/14 6:10pm

Old American Girl Dolls Are Selling for Hundreds of Dollars on eBay

Of the five original American Girl dolls that gripped the hearts of millennial youth in the '80s and '90s, only two — Addy and Samantha — are still on sale through Pleasant Company. To fill this nostalgia void (and make some big bucks), opportunists have taken to eBay to sell their old American Girl Dolls for hundreds… » 11/08/14 12:30pm 11/08/14 12:30pm

​12 Strange And Disturbing Facts About The Original My Little Pony

Some people are weirded out by the immense popularity of My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic. But other than the terrifying Equestria Girls, FiM has nothing on the original My Little Pony cartoon. Here are a dozen weird bits of trivia about the classic show and the toys that may blow your pony minds. » 11/06/14 2:25pm 11/06/14 2:25pm

GoldieBlox Threatens Princess Culture With Hammer-Toting Dolls

GoldieBlox is coming for the mainstream standard of beauty in 2014, with action figures equipped with hammers and tool belts. Are you ready? The better question, is your little sister, daughter, niece or play cousin prepared for ... toy diversity? » 11/05/14 5:10pm 11/05/14 5:10pm

Tetris and Angry Birds Movies Are Coming, Because That's Cinema Now

Good luck getting the thumbs-up for an original concept featuring a female lead. But wouldn't you like to make a big-budget movie about some third-rate plastic tchotchke from the 1990s, instead? That's all Hollywood seems capable of producing these days, and now there are projects based on Angry Birds and Tetris, as… » 10/01/14 7:10pm 10/01/14 7:10pm

Mom Flips Lid Because Kid's Barbie Sounds Like It's Saying 'Fuck'

A U.K. mother has complained that her 7-year-old's Talkin' Barbie says "What the fuck?" in addition to programmed phrases like "Amaze!" and "I love a makeover!" Is this the work of a disgruntled Mattel employee or has Barbie finally grown sentient and realized how bullshit it is that she works about 50 jobs and all… » 9/16/14 1:45pm 9/16/14 1:45pm

Goodbye, Barbie: Lego Dethrones Mattel As the World's Top Toymaker

Please keep Barbie, Ken and Skipper in your prayers because it isn't going so well for the famous family: Lego has just surged past Mattel as the world's largest producer of small tchotchkes that are easily lost and hurt like the very devil when you step on them in the middle of the night. » 9/04/14 4:10pm 9/04/14 4:10pm

Lego Gets It Right, Releases Lady Scientist Play Set

Lego can’t understand how it got here, smack in the middle of a gender toy war, but they’ve raised a white flag by releasing several new lady scientist figures. Are you not entertained? » 8/06/14 11:10am 8/06/14 11:10am

Lego to Launch Female Scientist Series Following Gender Controversy

Lego has announced that it will launch science-themed play sets featuring female scientists and their lab tools. The series was chosen as the latest winner of Legos Ideas—in which people can submit and vote on proposals for play sets they'd like the toy company to sell—and comes on the heels of criticism surrounding… » 6/05/14 2:20pm 6/05/14 2:20pm

Romance Authors Share Memories of Their Favorite Childhood Toys

Some of today's biggest names in the romance novel business took a break from writing about down-and-dirty sex with "forbidden" lovers to share some sweet memories of childhood. Awww. » 5/03/14 1:00pm 5/03/14 1:00pm

The Beanie Baby King Got Busted for Tax Evasion, But Skirted Jail

There was a time when Beanie Babies were the hottest thing since Dutch tulip bulbs. But, like all fads, the market eventually collapsed and these strangely obsession-inducing toys were packed away into attics across America. But what of Ty Warner, Beanie Baby tycoon? » 4/23/14 1:20pm 4/23/14 1:20pm