Doctor Barbie Makes Girls Care Less About Becoming Doctor People

Astronaut, computer engineer, Hawaiian haver of "fun" —Barbie's held more jobs for which she's clearly unqualified than Ryan Seacrest. But all of her career costumes were supposed to be a means to an end, a way for girls to play with a doll who would encourage them to pursue their big dreams. Turns out, career-having… » 3/05/14 3:00pm 3/05/14 3:00pm

What Bizarre and Depraved Things Did You Subject Your Barbies To?

If you have been on the Internet in the past few weeks, it's likely been brought to your attention that Barbie, a little hunk of plastic shaped like a woman with synthetic hair on it, appeared in Sports Illustrated. Many feminists see this unholy union as a perfect reification of the problems with both crumbling… » 2/21/14 1:20pm 2/21/14 1:20pm

These Adorable Little Boys Will Solve The Cleaning Gender Gap

The other night I found myself perusing toddler cleaning sets on Amazon, as one does. There I was, looking through the toy Dysons and the tiny play ironing sets when I saw them, and caught a glimpse into our future. A future in which equality reigns and beruffled rubber gloves with faux jewels glued to them in an… » 12/20/13 6:15pm 12/20/13 6:15pm

The Glorious, Unmitigated Hysteria of the American Girl Doll Store

"This place is three floors? Oh my God," a wide-eyed dad let slip after taking a quick pic of his gleeful daughter. "Holy cow," he added a moment later, still unable to process what he'd gotten himself into. Clearly someone had not been properly prepared for the sublime majesty of the Fifth Avenue American Girl Place. » 12/19/13 4:05pm 12/19/13 4:05pm

If You Won’t Buy Your Kids Racist Presents, Don’t Buy Them Sexist Ones

Maybe it's because Santa is an old, white guy, but Christmas season has a special way of bringing out the inner sexist in grown-ups. In fact, I started my blog, Reel Girl, 2 days after Christmas, 4 years ago, because I was blown away by the gender stereotyped presents my three daughters, then ages 10 months, 3 and 6… » 12/11/13 11:30am 12/11/13 11:30am

iPotty, The iPad-Holding Latrine for Tots, Officially 2013's Worst Toy

The Campaign For A Commercial-Free Childhood held their annual TOADY competition, where consumers could vote on the worst toy of the year. Well, the results are in, and the coveted TOADY (Toys Oppressive And Destructive to Young Children) award went to the iPotty, the iPad holder with a toilet that lets your baby look… » 12/10/13 4:00pm 12/10/13 4:00pm

Beastie Boys to Girls: Get Your Own Damn Song

The Beastie Boys are threatening to sue GoldieBlox because the toy company used a parody of the Beastie Boys' song Girls in their awesome video showing little girls using an enormous Rube Goldberg contraption to turn off a shitty princess TV ad. Along with Universal Music, the Beastie Boys sent a letter to GoldieBlox… » 11/24/13 11:30pm 11/24/13 11:30pm

There's No 'Hot Holiday Toy' This Year. Can Christmas Even Happen?

It's a holiday tradition as American as eating too much and falling asleep in a chair while inane football comedy blares loudly from the flatscreen — adults deciding that all kids should be just nuts for a Hot Holiday Toy, and then redirecting that hysteria into ruining Christmas. This year, however, a problem: there » 11/22/13 3:00pm 11/22/13 3:00pm

The Children of China Do Not Give a Fuck About Barbies

Poor Mattel! They've been exploiting the cheap labor of China in order to make crappy toys for years now and how do the people of China thank them? By refusing to buy those crappy toys for their own kids. The company is currently pushing hard to grow their Chinese market — specifically by getting little girls excited… » 11/08/13 7:15pm 11/08/13 7:15pm

Buxom Animated Tooth Fairies Strut Their Stuff for Your Kids' Cash

Not content to let the Tooth Fairy live a life without product placement, the Real Tooth Fairies has decided to finally monetize the hardworking pixie. What's that sound, you ask? Oh, that's just the Easter Bunny and Santa locked in a closet, dancing while Rich Uncle Pennybags laughs and blows cigar smoke in their… » 7/23/13 9:34am 7/23/13 9:34am

Goth Barbie Celebrates ‘Freaky Flaws' by Looking Like Regular Barbie

Back in the days of yore (2010), toy giant Mattell lumbered into its laboratory and came out with an atypical line of dolls that's since been affectionately nicknamed "Goth Barbies." That term isn't exactly right — in reality, the brand is a bit different. The toy line is called Monster High, and it's set in a fictional… » 7/17/13 12:46pm 7/17/13 12:46pm