It doesn't matter that it's not an election year, and it also doesn't matter that Sarah Palin is more irrelevant than ever — this impression will never get old. NEVER EVER. Plus, Sartina Feylin (eh??) v. Lipton? COME ON! Life is good.

Have you ever thought about how rad it would be if Tina Fey took over Saturday Night Live once Lorne Michaels is ready to retire? Well, don't start now because I have it on good authority that A.) Lorne Michaels has actually been dead since the '80s and has been running the show as a ghost and B.) Tina Fey isn't…

After months of false "Blogs who Cried Breakup" rumors surrounding Miley "Just Being Miley" Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth, they finally huffed, and puffed, and blew the house down. Or something. IDK, wolves. BUT ANYWAY, the two have broken up on the reals, according to Page Six's multiple sources.

Ahem. Jada Pinkett Smith, one of the premiere Awesome Moms of our time, has something to say. And then she will drop the mic. But first:

Although Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, Justin Theroux, Jennifer Aniston, Chandler Bing and that duck called a truce at some point, as Brangelina's and Jenreaux's (?) marriages draw nearer, threatening to even land sort of around the same time, some obvious problems become apparent.

On a scale of 1 to Daddy Issues, Selena Gomez ranks among Sylvia Plath, Angelina Jolie and the daughter of the Dos Equis guy, if he has one. Not to mention, let's be honest, most of us.

So yeah, what is going on with that much-ballyhooed Mean Girls Broadway musical? Officially, nothing. Unofficially, everything. It may as well go into production tomorrow.

In this month's Vanity Fair, cream colored pony/pop singer Taylor Swift commented on a pretty lighthearted joke that hosts Amy Poehler and Tina Fey made at her expense at last month's Golden Globes. "There's a special place in hell for women who don't help other women," Swift remarked, inadvertently quoting Madeleine…

Remember back this morning when Taylor Swift condemned chuckle sisters Tina Fey and Amy Poehler to eternal hellfire? Yes, well, Amy Poehler has FINALLY apologized for hurting T-Swizzle's feelings (Tina Fey has probably fled to Wallonia, dyed her hair, and changed her name to Lady Valendorfean).

"As she sits drinking lavender lemonade,*" Taylor Swift tells Vanity Fair that everyone—including, and especially, other ladies in Hollywood—needs to shut the fuck up about how many penises are/may be in orbit around her: