This Week In Tabloids: The Gossip Gods Have Blessed Us, For Ben Affleck and J. Lo Are Back Together

Welcome to Midweek Madness, where the four major cover stories today alternate between conscious coupling and conscious uncoupling. On Team ‘We’re Finished,’ we’ve got Jessica Biel, Justin Timberlake, Brad Pitt, and Angelina Jolie. On Team ‘I Still Love You,’ we’ve got Katie Holmes, Jamie Foxx, Ben Affleck, and


This Week In Tabloids: Mary-Kate Olsen, Miley Cyrus, Nicole Kidman, and Gwen Stefani Are Pregnant 

Welcome to Midweek Madness, where we discover a new magazine store within walking distance of our office (the old one was several stops away on a very annoying train), enter it, notice the magazines are all old, ask the friendly old man if this week’s tabs have come in, are told they’re in the back, and follow him to…

This Week In Tabloids: Brad Pitt Might Be Fucking Marion Cotillard and Angie Might Have a Breakdown

Welcome to Midweek Madness, where we sift through the tales of our favorite (and least favorite) celebrities’ rumored despair in the hopes that we’ll feel better about our lives. Like, oh, I’ve been pretty stressed lately and my face is breaking out and also my bank account has been sort of sad since tax season ended,…

This Week In Tabloids: Ben Affleck and Charlize Theron Are Fucking, and Kris Jenner's Nose Is Falling Off

Welcome to Midweek Madness, where we receive word that Kris Jenner’s nose is falling off, run to Ace Hardware, buy some spackle, a joint knife, duct tape, Gorilla Glue, and book a first class ticket—expensed to Jezebel—to LAX, where we take an Uber Black all the way to Kris Jenner’s home in Calabasas. “Let me in!” we…