She's not fat, she's pregnant, you halfwits. Kendall and Kylie Jenner would like you to know that half-sister Kim Kardashian isn't an actual fat person, she's just got a baby in there. Duh.

Guys, what the world needs now is a big-budget display of American aggression. Thank Zeus for Paramount Pictures' G.I. Joe: Retaliation, which premiered last night in Hollywood. If you dig lantern-jawed dudes, WTF dresses and Molly Ringwald, step right up and check out this red carpet.

The Rock's thighs are... I don't even know what to say. They are impressive. As my friend Eve mentioned, "they look like challah!" So... uh, happy holidays?

New Zealand radio station The Rock got a lot of flak for its plan to give away a divorce on Valentine's Day. But no criticism was as effective as what actually happened — a lesbian couple sabotaged the contest.

In this edition of Tweet Beat, the Rock is in puppy love, Joel McHale is trying on leather pants (pics or it didn't happen, Joel), Jackie Collins is jamming to Michael Jackson and Kim Kardashian is no Kristen Bell.

I recently found out that The Rock may have learned about Osama Bin Laden's death before any of us. If I had Mr. Dwayne Johnson's number, I might be tempted to share big news with him too — because I sort of love him.

More than 250 industry insiders were turned away from a Franco appearance on the A&E program, and by "industry insiders," I'm sure they mean ladies who are totally trying to move in on your boyfriend and his sexually confusing mustache.

Celebrities came out last night in support of the CNN Heroes program, which honors "everyday people changing the world." Most of the celebs seemed to play it relatively safe, fashion-wise, but there were a few highlights.

• Lindsay Lohan wasn't surprised by the negative reaction to her Ungaro debut, as she feels people are always out to criticize her: "I am a target. I don't know why I am, but I am, and I accept that." [TimesOnline]