Teens Nationwide Defy Indoor Tanning Bans, Take a Stand for Right to Bake Themselves

Indoor tanning, favored by the likes of Tan Mom and New Jersey housewife/convicted criminal Teresa Giudice, has never been known for being safe. But, as more states are making it illegal for those under 18 to partake in the practice, it’s becoming evident that some teens are going to keep tanning no matter what. »9/21/15 6:30pm9/21/15 6:30pm

Tanning Salon Employee Has Epic Racist Freakout Over 'Sexy Indian' Ad

Yesterday, we brought you one of the most ill-advised ads for a tanning salon ever (as though tanning could get any more gauche), a tacky, racist mess that featured a white lady in a "Sexy Indian" Halloween costume along with copy that read "The Indians brought more than just 'CORN' to the first Thanksgiving... they… »11/07/13 5:20pm11/07/13 5:20pm

Tanning Salon Is Super Thankful Native Americans 'Brought Sexy Color'

In honor of Thanksgiving, a chain of tanning salons in Alabama and Florida has launched a holiday-themed ad campaign that is both offensively stupid and stupidly offensive. "The Indians brought more than just 'CORN' to the first Thanksgiving," reads the copy, "they brought SEXY 'COLOR'!" Ugh, the unnecessary… »11/06/13 4:50pm11/06/13 4:50pm

Fake Tanning Gunk Is Destroying Some Mattresses in the UK

Bronzers and other gooey, UV-free artificial tanners may help the porcelain-hued citizens of the world achieve that sun-burnished quality so desirable by today’s aesthetics, but such tanners will also turn everyone who uses them into giant, weeping puddle monsters that seep through sheets and ruin perfectly adequate… »9/01/13 4:30pm9/01/13 4:30pm

Republican Named Yoho Declares Tanning Bed Tax Racist Against Whites

Ted Yoho is a former large animal veterinarian from Florida who doesn't understand what racism is. That alone does not make Ted Yoho interesting. What makes Ted Yoho interesting is the fact that he is a United States Congressman who doesn't understand what racism is, to the extent that he believes a tax on tanning… »8/06/13 1:50pm8/06/13 1:50pm

One in Seven People With Skin Cancer Go Back to Tanning Beds

In case you hadn't figured it out already, tanning is addicting. So addicting, in fact, that one in seven tanners diagnosed with skin cancer go back to tanning even after their diagnosis. The endorphins released by skin cells after exposure to UV light make many people who tan dependent on getting into the ole' UV… »7/12/13 6:15pm7/12/13 6:15pm

Tanning Is a Young, White, Female Problem. And It's Deadly.

There are lots of causes we could argue are worth dying for: saving a life, freedom, maybe even religious martyrdom or something epic like that. Having “bronzed, sun-kissed” skin is not one of them. Not even Coco Chanel would argue with that, though she is credited with starting the Western trend of white women… »4/10/13 1:20pm4/10/13 1:20pm

Weirdly Arbitrary Study Finds People Who Watch Reality TV Are More Likely to Use Tanning Beds

When I was a senior in high school, my parents and I took a trip to Samoa to visit my uncle. In preparation, because I am essentially a cave salamander, my mom forced me to go to a tanning salon and get a "base" so that I wouldn't crisp like a tater-tot in the South Pacific sun. I crisped anyway, of course (this raw… »2/25/13 4:00pm2/25/13 4:00pm

People of the Sun, Unite! Tanning Industry Uses ‘Big Tobacco’ Marketing Tactics to Paint Doctors as ‘Villains’

Tanning beds are awesome and full of life-blasting vitamins, whereas doctors are stupid, maybe even villainously stupid and need to be stopped from telling people who want only to lay their tired heads down on a bed of synthetic sunshine that tanning salons are not the second-best places in the Solar System (the first… »8/24/12 12:45pm8/24/12 12:45pm

If You Don't Like Tan Mom, You're Just Jealous, Fat and Ugly

Guys. Is Tan Mom drunk? Is she slurring a little? And what is she talking about?
"Everything is dangerous."
"I tan, a rela — you know — one, once in a, three, four times a week. It's my relaxation."
"Any mother that says something or doesn't even know me… They don't have children."
"It's a blush."
"I don't sit in… »5/04/12 12:45pm5/04/12 12:45pm