Here's What Happens When You Report Sexual Misconduct on the Subway

Yesterday morning, between 9:30 and 9:40 a.m. (yes, I was running late to work) I was the victim of sexual misconduct at the Fulton Street subway stop, at the exit near Fulton and William streets. The MTA and the NYPD failed to provide substantial measures in responding to and reporting the incident. » 5/08/15 12:05pm 5/08/15 12:05pm

The MTA Will Finally Chastise Men Whose Balls Need Three Seats

I have testicles, they're fairly sizeable (physically, not metaphorically), and they don't need a separate seat on the subway. In fact, no matter how big someone's balls are (again, speaking from a purely physical standpoint), they will never need an extra seat. Yet some men continue to sit on the train as though they… » 11/18/14 5:45pm 11/18/14 5:45pm

How to Ignore a Man Who Is Trying to Pick You Up on the Subway

A 48-year-old New York City Man by the name of Brian Robinson has penned an instructional manual called How to Meet Women on the Subway. In a recent interview, he claims that during his time in the big horny apple, he's guilt tripped and bullied persuaded 500 women he met on a subway platform into going on dates with… » 10/14/14 11:50am 10/14/14 11:50am

Subway Reminds Women to Stay Thin For Slutty Halloween Costumes

Hey ladaaays, because you've got your priorities straight, I know you've already got your Slutoween costumes on deck because Halloween is the only night of the year where it's acceptable for the ladyfolk to show some skin. But how's that body looking? Is it banging enough? Luckily Subway is here to help ensure that… » 10/02/14 3:20pm 10/02/14 3:20pm

Man Caught Taking Upskirt Videos Looks Exactly How You'd Expect

A 33-year-old Long Island man was arrested in the human anthill known as the Union Square subway station yesterday after cops caught him filming video up a woman's skirt without her knowledge or permission. In the photo local NYC news ran of the man, he is wearing a shirt that reads "I (HEART) ASIAN GIRLS," holding a… » 4/30/14 11:40am 4/30/14 11:40am