dirt bag
- Lindsay Lohan will appear on SIX EPISODES of Ugly Betty, including the season finale. LL will play an old classmate of Betty's who is down on her luck. Naomi Campbell, Christian Siriano, Victoria Beckham and now Lindsay? It's official: Ugly Betty is the new Love Boat. [TMZ]
- Oooh, Lindsay's mugshot is being used in a drunk driving ad. [Reuters]
- Courtney Love was in the hospital over the weekend; homegirl has strep throat! Stay away. (Not that you needed a warning.) [Mirror]
- Thirty guests attended Jamie Lynn Spears's baby shower in Kentwood, LA on Saturday and big sis Britney was one of them. The ladies sat in a circle and opened gifts and nothing scandalous happened, yawn. [People]
- Britney hadn't been in her hometown since early 2007. Bet she misses some Southern cooking. [People]
- Miley Cyrus appeared at the Disney Channel Games concert Saturday night and thanked fans, saying: "Thank you guys for all your support. Without you, none of this would be possible. I love every one of you and I could not be more appreciative. God bless you." Then she took her top off. Kidding! [People]
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dirt bag
- Uh-oh... Tracie Rice, the woman who was in the car Lindsay Lohan chased at high speed right before her DUI arrest last July, claims she has spent upwards of $3,500 on therapy since the incident (and lost her job). Guess who she wants to pay for the shrink? Papers have been filed! [TMZ]
- Lindsay is also being sued by the busboy who was injured when her car smashed into his vehicle in 2005. Raymundo Ortega is also naming The Ivy restaurant in his suit; he claims the hotspot supplied LL with booze before the accident. Linz had better quit shopping and start working. [TMZ]
- The cancellation of the Golden Globes means no movie studio parties, no magazine parties, no hotel room reservations, no limos, etc. The Los Angeles economy will reportedly take a $100 million hit. [Page Six]
- The LAPD issued a restraining order to Britney Spears last Thursday night during her custody standoff. The emergency protective order is enforced for five business days and dictates that the person it's placed on stays 100 feet from the other person or face arrest. Sick of this story yet? [People]
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dirt bag
- American Idol finalist and sex-tape star Jessica Sierra, whom you may have last seen smoking naked in a bathtub, is pregnant. The father is a "rapper." Sierra remains in a Florida jail, though she is now in the infirmary on a "pregnancy diet." [TMZ]
- Hey, have you heard the rumor that the father of Jamie Lynn's baby is rapper and fellow Nickelodeon star Lil' Romeo? Yeah, we hadn't either, until now. But here it is! So... yeah. [The.Life Files]
- Meanwhile Casey Aldridge, the reported babydaddy, has been avoiding the spotlight and gone into hiding. "He doesn't want to say the wrong thing to the media," a pastor in his hometown said. "At the right time he will speak." Casey was class president and campus favorite at his high school and the principle says "He was just a super dude." Well okay then. [USA Today]
- Also, Casey is 18, not 19, so no statutory rape. Apparently. [CelebTV.com]
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dirt bag
- Oprah's not a hairdresser, but she did chop about nine inches off of Hilary Swank's mane — which was then donated to Pantene Beautiful Lengths. The segment will air on Oprah's show Friday. Wonder if either of them read about how sometimes writing a check is better? [People]
- Lance Armstrong and Ashley Olsen: Still at it. The couple had dinner at New York's Waverly Inn, owned by Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter. [Page Six]
- Was Gisele Bundchen a witch for Halloween? She cut the line at a haunted house in New York. [Page Six]
- Paul McCartney's soon-to-be-ex-wife, Heather Mills, is so upset about being branded a "whore and a gold digger" that she has thoughts of suicide. "I considered killing myself because I thought, if I am dead, [Beatrice] can be safe with her father," she says. [Page Six]
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dirt bag
- OMG. This is amazing. Sex-tape star Kim Kardashian was seen "making out" with Terrence Howard! And he was seen "rubbing her butt"! Does she know about the baby wipes??? [Page Six]
- Jennifer Lopez's mom told a Daily News reporter she didn't hear about Jennifer being pregnant. "You know more than I do. I don't talk to her very often." Ouch! We're totally calling our mom later. [Rush & Molloy]
- Lindsay Lohan's rep says the rumor about LL shagging married dude Tony Allen in rehab is "mean" and "untrue." Because that's her job. [Rush & Molloy]
- Have you seen Beyoncé's new dark hair? [StereoHyped]
- Mary-Louise Parker's adoption of an African girl is "a great idea" says Angelina Jolie. Inside she was thinking, "Copycat!" [Page Six]
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dirt bag
- The Eva Longoria nupti-news continues: Ryan Seacrest wept and everyone got huffy (heh) when Teri Hatcher showed up mugging for cameras in a dress tailored to look exactly like the bridesmaid dress. Um, if succeeding at undermining someone requires wearing a bridesmaid dress when you don't have to we would normally call it a Pyrric Victory but it was Eva Longoria, so, go Teri! [Gatecrasher]
- Madonna demands eye contact during interviews. We can't wait to see the contract her lawyers drew up for sex! [Huffington Post]
- Aw. Sean Preston is only three years old and already he is carrying mommy's cigarettes like a good boy. Baby knows it's hard to fit everything in mommy's bikini bottoms! [The Sun]
- New word we just made up: Fauxbriety. It's what guylined Ashlee Simpson boychick Pete Wentz is into when he's not practicing sobriety. [Rush & Molloy]
- Brandon Davis should maybe look into it! [Page Six]
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polls
While we can accept that
Maroon 5 is the Police of our generation — and fine,
Dave Eggers is Mark Twain and whatever else — a gentle reader alerted us today to some brand fucking new
Maroon 5 lyrics that would
never have been written by
Sting:
I wanna give you something better
Than anything you've ever had
A stronger and a faster lover
The world, it disappears so fast
Sweet kiwi
Your juices dripping down my chin
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alyssa shelasky
So dating blogger
Alyssa Shelasky — catch up on how she dangled those participles all the way into our hearts
here — finally comes clean about why
shitty she dumped the product abusing jam band listening "honest" "innocent," "loving" banker
she once called "The One" the Observer. (Pictured above, drowning his sorrows for the legions on MySpace). And the answer is: she met a man who listened to
Sting.
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Jezebel
