Earlier today, U.S. Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor included a written statement along with the court's rejection of a criminal case. In this unusual action, your favorite justice's letter condemned a federal prosecutor in Texas who behaved like a real dick.

Her Honor Sonia Sotomayor, whose face I would wear on a t-shirt, released her long awaited memoir, My Beloved World yesterday. Cheesy title aside, the book promises to take us on a journey from her childhood in a Bronx housing project to her current reality as my second favorite Supreme Court Justice. The fact that…

Even after Justice Sotomayor performed a holiday miracle by waving her gavel at a grey flannel sky and causing sundry forms of contraception to snow down onto every tax-exempt piece of Catholic real estate in the land (that's how pop-up books in the future will tell it, so you better get on board with the legend now),…

Ugh, it's like one of those nauseating stories you hear where someone was supposed to go on vacation with their friends and then they got mono at the last minute and had to stay home and then the plane crashed—except in this case the person with mono is the American public and the ill-fated flight is Jon Stewart almost …

Is there a way to make this required viewing for every single kid in America? And some adults, too? It's just so awesome.

As November approaches, she'll become so ubiquitous that you'll swear you know her. You overhear her conversations with her husband, you see the concern on her face as she balances a baby on her hip while musing aloud about the future of Medicare. Barack Obama wants to take my baby's piggy bank, she'll say, in a less…

Governor of New Jersey Chris Christie dashed the hopes of many a frustrated golf playing white guy when he announced yesterday that now is not the time for him to vie for the Republican Presidential nomination. In the weeks leading up to his announcement, speculation swirled about his policy positions and viability as…

This is something that never needed to happen, but we're subjecting you to it anyway. A reader of the tell-all memoir by his ex-girlfriend Lillian McEwen (who previously made the rounds after Ginni Thomas called Anita Hill demanding an apology) divulges the following details from it:

The appointments of Justices Elena Kagan and Sonia Sotomayor caused liberals to wring their hands with worry. What if they weren't liberal enough? What was the President doing? Liberals, breathe a sigh of relief for now. They're kicking ass.