Diet Soda Makes You Thin! Says Questionable Study By Soda Companies

Good news: a new study conducted via science has shown that that Diet Coke and other similar artificially flavored and colored bubbly beverages can actually help people lose weight! Bad news: the study was completely and 100% funded by soda manufacturers. In comparable 1967 news: new study by Malboro shows that… »5/27/14 3:00pm5/27/14 3:00pm

New Diet Coke Slogan Is About Drugs, Say Cool People Who Are Not Narcs

Apparently, Diet Coke's new ad campaign: "You're on!" is drawing fire for being a terribly irresponsible and naughty DRUG REFERENCE FOR DRUGGIES. Sometimes the billboards say, "Diet Coke. You're on." And sometimes they say, "You're on. Diet Coke." But either way, they're clearly talking about your brain being on… »3/04/14 5:00pm3/04/14 5:00pm

British Woman Was Drinking 50 Diet Cokes a Day and Tripping Balls

It's easy to make fun of the Daily Mail, but those of us who indulge in the practice often forget about paper's razor-sharp journalistic instincts, which are nowhere more evident than in this latest gem of a story about a British woman who, at one point in her acid trip of an adulthood, was consuming 50 cans of Diet… »2/23/14 4:00pm2/23/14 4:00pm

Un-American Americans Are Cutting Back on Drinking Soda

America's three biggest soda companies, Coca-Cola, Pepsi and Dr. Pepper Snapple Group, have reported declining sales in the last quarter. And though it may seem that health-conscious Americans are probably opting for the diet versions of their favorite speshal juice, it's actually the diet versions of sodas that are… »7/25/13 2:40pm7/25/13 2:40pm

Diet Dr Pepper Is the Best Beverage Ever Invented by Man (or Nature)

I will eat an entire cake and/or pie, and I will down half a package of Watermelon Oreos (sorry, Lindy), but I will die before I drink calories*. I don't know if it was coming of age in the 90s with a mom who was both always dieting and in possession of a Costco membership, but I've indulged in my fair share of diet… »7/18/13 11:10am7/18/13 11:10am

'Honest' Version of Coca Cola's Anti-Obesity Ad Is Actually a Scary Truth Bomb

Here's the new Coca-Cola commercial, in which the brand brags about all it's doing to help people consume fewer calories: "Across our portfolio of over 650 beverages, we now offer over 180 low and no calorie choices," the narrator explains. If you like, you can also watch the new Coca-Cola commercial explaining how… »1/17/13 10:45am1/17/13 10:45am

New Coca-Cola Ads Mention Obesity, But Still Insist Coca-Cola Has 'Happy' Calories

Coca-Cola is the world's number one beverage company, and known for ad campaigns that equate soft drinks with joy. From "Have a Coke and a Smile" to "open happiness" and the Happiness Machine, Coca-Cola has always focused on positivity. But in new commercials hitting the air starting today, the brand will do something… »1/14/13 3:40pm1/14/13 3:40pm