Ohhhhhh my GOD, I will never ever ever in my life get tired of stories where doctors use poop as medicine. EVER. Because, you see, it's poop (which is stinky stuff that comes out of your butt*), and then doctors (who are very serious science grown-ups) have to touch the poop with doctory gravitas, and then they turn…
Apparently the three-year-olds of Bristol, England got a taste for fido's feces and now they can't get enough. Yummy yummy.
Because why not, some gadzillionaire has invested in the Titanic II
I swear a lot. In writing, if not so much in speech (but, fuck it, also a lot of times in speech). Swearing is awesome, because it adds a little extra punch to your sentence that lets people know you mean business! Or, at least, I guess that's how most people characterize the function of swearing. Personally, I don't…
What goes in, must come out — and when it does come out, it's basically a murky crystal ball into your gastrointestinal health. Poo is the funky combo of water, fiber, bacteria, cells, and mucus that fills your toilet bowl — and that's all good. However, when weird colors, textures, and consistencies get up in the…
In November of 2011, Cindi Leive, editor in chief of Glamour magazine, wrote the coverline "12 Ways to Get Your Sh*t Together." Then for the September 2012 issue, there was a coverline "Sh*t Girls Say About Clothes." Yes, in both cases, the "i" in "shit" was an asterisk, but still. It should have been a pearl-clutching moment: …
When I was a sophomore in college, making my dollars working in the theatre department's costume shop, I stitched alongside a posse of unspeakably cool senior girls. Being prime players in the University's theatre scene, they were into shock and awe when it came the way they dressed, did their hair, and even — or…
In 2008 I was living in Paraguay. I had just started my two-year stint as a Peace Corps volunteer and I was in charge of procuring my own work. Arts and crafts projects would have been a simple way to improve the community while I adjusted to an entirely new diet and language. But I had little patience and thought I…
It's no secret that children can play awful tricks on one another, but you don't usually expect teachers and parents to be in on the prank. But that's exactly what happened during a class canoe trip in Manitoba, Canada, when a parent chaperone tricked two different students into eating moose poop. Karen Eyolfson says…
Yay! More tasty dark corners in the saga of mysteriously deceased fake-art huckster Thomas Kinkade, Painter of Light (also Groper of Light, Public Urinator of Light, Drunk Driver of Light, and Siegfried & Roy Magic Tiger Show Disruptor of Light). At the time when he became suddenly and mysteriously dead (of Light),…
If you have a baby you, quite literally, have to deal with a lot of shit. And the only thing more disturbing than scooping poop clumps out of your daughter's vagina or scraping off feces caked onto your son's balls is that you will want need to talk about it to anyone who will listen, which unsurprisingly isn't very…
A typo can change everything:
Elizabeth Olsen, the younger sister of Mary Kate and Ashley (my first thought upon learning of her existence- There are more Olsens?! They can't be stopped!), has denied rumors that she will star in a Sex & The City prequel movie. If not her, then, who?
Since yesterday's gross stories
With the news that the U.S. Second Circuit Court of Appeals unanimously decidedthat the FCC's indecency policy—for fleeting expletives—is vague and unconstitutional, we've compiled a celebratory reel featuring our favorite uncensored moments of women cursing on live TV.
Tom is a 30-something married man; well-spoken, articulate, and easygoing. He also gets off on constipated women.
There's been some discussion
Does this remind anyone of a certain children's book? "I wrote before that Japanese people have a poop obsession. We love anthropomorphizing poop into a kind of character mascot." Love! Also: Can someone translate? [Watashi To Tokyo, via Global Voices]
Who cares about war, peace or health care reform when one can debate structural racism, Henry Gates and/or the circumstances of Obama's birth? No one! (Certainly not me or my brain on the last day of a very long week.)
The kids on The Paper went on deadline for the first issue of the school year and under the new regime of Amanda as "In Chief." It seemed to be a mess. Amanda got too caught up writing her own editorial (which she edited while on the can) to actually run the operation, nobody knew how to make a PDF file, and they had to…
Click to viewI've had poop issues for some time now. I'm pretty sure I have some kind of mild IBS, although IBS is really just a blanket term for a host of gastrointestinal problems. Anyway, I've only pooped four times in the past three weeks. (Most likely caused by my love affair with any and all cheeses.) So this…
Do you ever get up from the toilet and take a look at your poo? Leslie Crawford did, and wrote about it for Salon. See, there's this incredibly successful new book, What's Your Poo Telling You?, which you can pick up at Urban Outfitters, among other places. Because excrement is not just "ejecta," as Crawford calls it.…
About ten of you have emailed from Esquire about the things a man should never do in the company of a woman, like cleaning your gun or talking about the girls you used to fuck or "rapping" or blow-drying their hair. It's fun but not incredibly accurate; most of the dealbreakers, like calling a girl a "whore" in a way that …
