If you're trying to spend your holiday season rediscovering your faith in humanity, it's probably best that you not think about how 30,000 people collectively spent $180,000 buying actual boxes of shit from a card game company.

End of summer got you down in the dumps? You're not alone. In fact, nowhere in America is it shittier right now than it is on Mississippi State's campus, where a roving band of feral female undergraduates are allegedly shitting all over the place in an attempt to impress their desired sorority with their prolific…

A regional office of the Environmental Protection Agency is having a little difficulty protecting its own environment, as someone keeps using their hands or buttholes to leave human shit in the halls. Seriously.

Poop transplants—in which doctors take poop from one person and then put it directly into another person's butt—are a relatively new technology that can save lives. So it only makes sense that a human stool bank has opened to provide doctors with safe fecal matter from screened donors.

The trend of women's magazines using curse words on their covers continues: Cosmopolitan's January cover screams "52 HOLY SH@*!T SEX MOVES: Let the Games Begin!"

Ohhhhhh my GOD, I will never ever ever in my life get tired of stories where doctors use poop as medicine. EVER. Because, you see, it's poop (which is stinky stuff that comes out of your butt*), and then doctors (who are very serious science grown-ups) have to touch the poop with doctory gravitas, and then they turn…

Apparently the three-year-olds of Bristol, England got a taste for fido's feces and now they can't get enough. Yummy yummy.

Because why not, some gadzillionaire has invested in the Titanic II, an exact replica of that one crazy cruise ship that was so full of love, giant diamonds, and, uh, death, and apparently lonely boners and sad hearts are already willing to pay $1 million to be a bourgie guest at the Neue Titanic. But what if you're a…

I swear a lot. In writing, if not so much in speech (but, fuck it, also a lot of times in speech). Swearing is awesome, because it adds a little extra punch to your sentence that lets people know you mean business! Or, at least, I guess that's how most people characterize the function of swearing. Personally, I don't…

What goes in, must come out — and when it does come out, it's basically a murky crystal ball into your gastrointestinal health. Poo is the funky combo of water, fiber, bacteria, cells, and mucus that fills your toilet bowl — and that's all good. However, when weird colors, textures, and consistencies get up in the…

In November of 2011, Cindi Leive, editor in chief of Glamour magazine, wrote the coverline "12 Ways to Get Your Sh*t Together." Then for the September 2012 issue, there was a coverline "Sh*t Girls Say About Clothes." Yes, in both cases, the "i" in "shit" was an asterisk, but still. It should have been a…

When I was a sophomore in college, making my dollars working in the theatre department's costume shop, I stitched alongside a posse of unspeakably cool senior girls. Being prime players in the University's theatre scene, they were into shock and awe when it came the way they dressed, did their hair, and even — or…

In 2008 I was living in Paraguay. I had just started my two-year stint as a Peace Corps volunteer and I was in charge of procuring my own work. Arts and crafts projects would have been a simple way to improve the community while I adjusted to an entirely new diet and language. But I had little patience and thought I…