A Complete Breakdown of the Nutritional Content of Semen

To swallow or not to swallow: that is the question. You can only really answer it for yourself, but we aim to help you make that decision an informed one. Here, we list every property found in an average splooge—protein, carbs, fat, cholesterol, etc.—and analyze what it means for you to ingest it in terms of… » 8/07/13 1:30pm 8/07/13 1:30pm

Daring Sperm Smugglers in Palestine Brave Israeli Jails, Implausibility…

People try to sneak lots of miscellaneous contraband into prison, but how often do they try to sneak things that aren't people out of prison? Almost never, probably because the whole point of prison is that it doesn't have anything that anyone wants, except, in the case of Israeli prisons holding Palestinian… » 2/24/13 5:00pm 2/24/13 5:00pm

Get Your Jizz While the Getting's Good: Sperm Quality and Quantity Is…

In some parts of the world, there has been a considerable decline in sperm quality and quantity in recent years, according to reports from sperm banks as well as evidence from scientific research. The cause is not yet known, but some are pointing pollutants and a "modern Western lifestyle," which includes cellphones… » 8/29/12 12:00pm 8/29/12 12:00pm

Semen Probably Isn’t a Magic Super Elixir After All

Earlier this week, we learned (again) about the restorative elixir of life that is semen, which can, according to spermspert Gordon Gallup, Jr. and his anonymous survey of 293 college women, cure depression, make women smarter and, possibly, fertilize eggs. This is just what semen does, Gallup's survey seemed to… » 8/26/12 4:00pm 8/26/12 4:00pm

Got Morning Sickness? Give Two Blow Jobs and Call Me in the Morning

No amount of heavy duty feminism can alleviate the fact that when it comes to child creation, all a guy really must do is not ride a bike too much, ejaculate successfully into a fertile vagina, and then maybe hand out cigars. Meanwhile, the woman spends nine months growing a tiny, helpless proto-human inside her… » 7/10/12 6:30pm 7/10/12 6:30pm