Aw man, not this human egg-fart again. Noted social butterfly and vulnerable-starlet-betrayer Sam Lutfi is back in the "news" again, having released a number of private texts that he claims are from a hysterical, emotionally dysfunctional Britney Spears. I don't know if they're actually from Britney or not, and I…

In case you missed it, a couple of Justin Timberlake's skeezy friends made a "hilarious" video for him as a "wedding present," in which they filmed adorable dancing homeless clowns congratulating the happy couple. See, it's funny, because homeless people aren't friends with celebrities and don't get to go to weddings…

If you remember when Britney Spears had a very messy, very public breakdown, you'll recall that there was a man in her life back then, the shady character known as Sam Lutfi. In 2009, Britney's father obtained conservatorship over Britney and filed a restraining order against Lutfi, who was in constant contact with…

• Lady Gaga's concert in Paris was postponed on Sunday due to snow, and it was the second time she was forced to change her Paris show date.

• Oh no. You know how someone is harassing and stalking Lindsay Lohan? The culprit might be none other than Sam Lutfi. Ugh.

• A "friend" of Taylor Swift says that the singer wants nothing to do with the song Kanye West claims he wrote for her.

Today in Tweet Beat, Lindsay Lohan is going on and on about the unfairness of her prison sentence and how her "fuck you" nails were not intentional. Plus, celebs weigh in on Ke$ha's semen photo.

Today in Tweet Beat, Hailey Glassman is trying her hand at acting, this day in history, Debbie Gibson filmed her "Foolish Beat" video, and celebs celebrate St. Patrick's Day.

• Martha Stewart's ex-best friend has written a book, in which she claims that Martha is desperate for a new husband.

Today in Tweet Beat, Courtney Love accuses Lily Allen of being a cokehead brat after Lily posts unflattering picture of Courtney. Plus, Sam Lutfi accuses Lynne Spears of being a pillhead.

Today in Tweet Beat, it's fun to watch Rainn Wilson pick on Heidi Montag, Richard Belzer's dog is a shower, and Christian Lisa Whelchel's "Plan B day" isn't really what it sounds like.

• Last night Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson called a locksmith because Sam lost her house keys. While he was working Lindsay found an open window crawled in. The locksmith asked for his $39 fee, but Lindsay wouldn't pay.

• Paris Hilton's dogs live better than you do. She posted pictures via Twitter of their doghouse—for her 13 purse-sized dogs—that was designed as a mini version of her own home. [Daily Mail]

• Rihanna has a new song, with guest vocals by Lady GaGa, titled Silly Boy. Kanye West posted it online, and the lyrics are:

• Thanks to the tipsters who let us know that Chris Brown was hanging out at their school, the University of Mary Washington earlier this week, and that his visit was very poorly timed.

• John Mayer wrote a song called "Heartbreak Warfare" so naturally there is speculation that it's about Ms. Jennifer Aniston. But, uh, check out these lyrics:

• In court today Sam Lutfi filed a declaration claiming he hasn't been texting Britney in violation of his restraining order. He says Brit has texted him, but he conveyed his responses through Adnan Ghalib. [TMZ]

• At an Oscar party, Madonna congratulated ex-husband Sean Penn on his win. Penn reportedly gestured at Jesus Luz and said: "Thanks. Another kid already?" [The Sun]

• At a concert in Seattle, Etta James said:

• Amy Winehouse must be coming to her senses: she's given control of her £15 million fortune to her parents. She can't spend her own money without their approval, so drugs are probably out. [Mirror]