Oprah's 'Favorite Things' Will Run You $13,054

Oprah, who future civilizations will look back upon and assume was our queen, has released her annual "Favorite Things" list. Long gone are the days when we witnessed the unveiling of this rich lady fantasy on-air as a lucky studio audience of women had controlled brain aneurisms. Now, we must be content with clicking… » 11/05/14 3:45pm 11/05/14 3:45pm

Rich People Work Out to Lose Weight, Poor People Take Diet Pills

The relationship between poverty and weight is a vital yet often downplayed aspect of the "obesity epidemic." Poor people have less nutritious food in their neighborhood stores (if they have stores at all), less money to buy it, less time to cook it, and less access to preventive medical care. But the fact that… » 8/21/14 4:00pm 8/21/14 4:00pm

Things I Learned About Rich People From the Goop Pop-Up Shop

This week, Gwyneth Paltrow, but more likely the people who work for her, launched a six-day Goop pop-up in Los Angeles in the tony 'hood of Brentwood. It was all the things you'd expect exactly at the correct place in the universe where you would most expect it. I asked a friend to meet me and drove 5.7 miles to check… » 5/06/14 4:15pm 5/06/14 4:15pm

How Much Money Do People in Your City Spend on Pets?

I don't have any pets, because I am allergic (...to having to fucking get up every morning and go outside and stand around waiting for an animal to poop and then touch the poop and then carry the poop around with me), but I do have love for the little buddies. And I understand that, in a lot of people's families,… » 4/30/14 10:40am 4/30/14 10:40am

I Went to An Oscars Gifting Suite and All I Got Was a Glowing Lipgloss

I'll tell you right now that I am not a celebrity. I know that may be hard to believe what with my extravagant lifestyle and frequent trips to both Marshalls and Ross for quality clothing at bargain prices. However, I've always wanted to live like a rock star (well, a rock star in their 50s who just naps a lot) so… » 3/01/14 5:15pm 3/01/14 5:15pm

Romantic Valentine's Day Meal Can Be Yours for the Low Cost of $93,300

Valentine's Day (the who-cares-iest of all the holidays) is right around the corner, so hopefully you've been saving up a Scrooge McDuck's vault's worth of gold to buy your significant other (or the body pillow that you call your "significant other") a proper gift. One particularly romantic option — if you're… » 2/11/14 5:40pm 2/11/14 5:40pm

Food in the House of Lords Is Not Fancy Enough, Complain Fancy Jerks

Oh, noooooooooo. Diners in the upper house of the U.K. Parliament are getting right stroppy about the current House of Lords restaurant options (all of which are taxpayer-subsidized) thanks to small wait lists, less than satisfactory cappuccinos and the lack of Chilean wine on the wine list. And don't even mention the… » 2/03/14 1:00pm 2/03/14 1:00pm

Rich Idiots Will Pay Nearly $30K a Night to Sleep in Luxury Hotels

Those darn wealthy people! It's like every time you see them, they're doing some ridiculous new thing like lighting a cigar with a $100 bill, buying their way onto lifeboats on the Titanic or tricking a rube into selling his oil-rich land for far less than it's worth. And this time's no different. Now, our world's… » 1/21/14 3:00pm 1/21/14 3:00pm

Shit Rich Businesswomen Are Doing: 'Pedicure Powwows'

If you're anything like me, the idea of being the kind of fancy person who goes to "power lunches" to make business deals is a pretty foreign concept. However just in case you (also like me) are planning to Count of Monte Cristo yourself and eventually live among the rich as your eccentric and wealthy alter ego,… » 11/12/13 4:40pm 11/12/13 4:40pm