Jezebel
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Radar
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pretty in pink
Loose Lips
A source tells People that Jamie Lynn Spears has been flashing an engagement ring around Kentwood. Wonder if she'll save her baby from bastardom! • Those reports about Heath Ledger being worth a mere $145,000 are false, says TMZ: "We're told Heath has considerably more assets than the $145k. On top of that, sources say he lived all over the world and was smart enough to know all of his money shouldn't sit in the U.S., where taxes are a bitch." • Spencer Pratt's new advice column is up and running on Radar's website. Here are his sage words to a girl who drunkenly peed her boyfriend's bed: "This is a situation you do not want to find yourself in. I personally would never want to be with a girl who gets so wasted that she's pissing in bed. It's time to sign up for AA, my dear, because drunks are not sexy." [People, TMZ, Radar]
Hot Air
Hey! Do you know a guy who'd like to have sex with Lindsay Lohan? How about Jennifer Lopez? Or Eva Longoria? That dude's dream can come true with celebrity blow-up dolls. A company called Pipedream products has a line of star-inspired plastic inflatable sex toys. CEO Nick Orlandino says, "They're on the edge, funny, and topical. It gets my boat floating. The SJP (Sarah Jessica Porkher) doll is funniest." Click the picture at left to see some more packages; there's a mildly NSFW slide show here. [Radar]
Hey! Do you know a guy who'd like to have sex with Lindsay Lohan? How about Jennifer Lopez? Or Eva Longoria? That dude's dream can come true with celebrity blow-up dolls. A company called Pipedream products has a line of star-inspired plastic inflatable sex toys. CEO Nick Orlandino says, "They're on the edge, funny, and topical. It gets my boat floating. The SJP (Sarah Jessica Porkher) doll is funniest." Click the picture at left to see some more packages; there's a mildly NSFW slide show here. [Radar]
dirt bag
Spencer Pratt Wants To Solve Your Problems
- Spencer Pratt is getting an advice column in Radar. "Yo Spencer!" will debut in the April issue; the idea is so dumb it's genius. [USA Today]
- The Beckhams went shopping at the Pleasure Chest adult store in Hollywood and stocked up on supplies. "They seemed to know exactly what they wanted," a witness says. What do you think was on their list? Vibes? Lube? The purple penetrator? [The Sun]
- Watch Britney's new anime video! [People]
- "It pains me to report that on the first day of the shoot, Britney knew her lines better than I knew mine," How I Met Your Mother actor Josh Radnor says. "She's been great to work with." [People]
- The CW network is developing a contemporary spinoff of Beverly Hills, 90210. Maybe think of it as a mashup of The OC and Gossip Girl. [The Hollywood Reporter]
Watch It
Over on Radar, Amy Monaghan has a run down of the decade's most misogynistic movies. Did some of your faves make the list? From Superbad ("Dick-obsessed Seth is... a cretin who is afraid of vaginas"), to The Devil Wears Prada ("'Wake up, Six!' was the quip that launched a thousand fingers down girls' throats."), Sin City ("Two-dimensional curvy broads in artsy black and white play strippers, hookers, and waitresses who get beaten, raped, and beheaded."), andBridget Jones's Diary ("She's just like you! Or at least she's exactly what Hollywood thinks you're like: frumpy, insecure, man-hungry, and completely incapable of self-discipline!"), the gang's all here! Whether you agree or not, the fact that the Superbad picture is captioned "There Will Be Blood" is genius. [Radar]
Over on Radar, Amy Monaghan has a run down of the decade's most misogynistic movies. Did some of your faves make the list? From Superbad ("Dick-obsessed Seth is... a cretin who is afraid of vaginas"), to The Devil Wears Prada ("'Wake up, Six!' was the quip that launched a thousand fingers down girls' throats."), Sin City ("Two-dimensional curvy broads in artsy black and white play strippers, hookers, and waitresses who get beaten, raped, and beheaded."), andBridget Jones's Diary ("She's just like you! Or at least she's exactly what Hollywood thinks you're like: frumpy, insecure, man-hungry, and completely incapable of self-discipline!"), the gang's all here! Whether you agree or not, the fact that the Superbad picture is captioned "There Will Be Blood" is genius. [Radar]
rag trade
Is Michelle Williams The Latest Victim Of The ELLE Curse?
- Further proof that there may really be a ELLE curse: WWD reports that actress Michelle Williams had already been shot for the April cover of the ladymag, but asked to have it and a related story pulled after the death of Heath Ledger. She's since been replaced with Natalie Portman. [WWD, 1st item]
- Eva Mendes is the face of the still-unnamed, still-unlaunched new Calvin Klein fragrance. Given that Mendes is the mascot, we assume the scent smells like a hot bod and forgettable acting career. [WWD, sub req'd]
- Kimora Lee Simmons also has a new fragrance out, called Fabulosity. (Of course.) Says Simmons, "Yes, I'm over the top, and yes, I'm unapologetic, and yes, I have really big diamonds, but I have an equally big heart and an equally big spirit." [WWD, sub req'd]
As Radar magazine puts it, what prom was for Carrie, Thanksgiving is for the Rachel Zoe's and Mary Kate's of the world: Torture. ("They're all going to laugh at you!) So what's a poor anorexic to do? Strategize, naturally! Here's an abridged version of their extra-special guide: "Cast your decision not to eat the noble bird as an act of respect for one of our greatest founding fathers. Then accuse everyone at the table of hating you for your freedom"; "Situate yourself between food-medicating uncles and hormonal nephews. Make like a seasoned air traffic controller and wave by dish after dish"; "Thanksgiving is the perfect time to bring up the fact that Uncle Ralph is in his brother-in-law's pocket for $4,037 after that coke deal went sour. In the resulting family-on-family moral pile-on, sit back in your chair and nod off to the concerto of acid in your stomach." Thanks, Radar! We can feel our stomachs growling already...and oh the hunger feels so good! [Radar]
the week that was
This Week We Discussed Pizza, Bacon Cheeseburgers, Now and Laters.
We worried about Tinsley's eating habits.And about this girl who sold her vaj for a bacon double cheeseburger.
We crushed on DJ to the stars Mark Ronson.
And anti-crushed on Glamour jerkblogger Mike Cherico.
We wondered why high-end salesgirls are so cunty.
And fretted over the the safety of our dear Anonymous Lobbyist.
Finally, Dissecting Ms. made Slut Machine hungry for Now and Laters.
Radar magazine reports that Kate Moss is on a downward spiral. The magazine takes a look at Moss' cover photos from the model's 15+ year career and attempts to shows how she's progressed from then to now. Memo to Radar: That's not a downward spiral. That's called aging. And aging pretty gracefully, considering the coke habit! [Radar]
question gravity
Spencer Pratt Loves God, Plans To Become President Of United States
Radar runs an interview with The Hills antihero/antichrist Spencer Pratt in its politics issue, because it turns out he would like to be President someday! (In addition to being a billionaire by the age of thirty, which he totally deserves because "managing" the retard career of some retard blond you fucked and forced to get plastic surgery totally falls somewhere on the spectrum of "business visionary" between inventing Google and inventing Facebook.) (Also: Heidi sings "like a Mouseketeer on steroids."??) You should really read the whole thing, because interviewer (and Page Six Mag editor) Rachel Syme admirably restrained her vomit reflexes long enough to catch gems like "If there is a God, I love God," and "I'm thinking about ideas that people might think are crazy, and I'm like, this world is crazy, where do you think we are? You want to tell me there's a planet and there's a universe, and gravity holding us down? It's like, okay, I'm crazy then." More »
star scribblings
Britney Spears Is Stubborn, Sweet... Hopefully Not Pregnant
Everyone's getting in on the handwriting analysis game. Today, RadarOnline has the apologetic missive Britney Spears sent to celebrity photo agency x17 analyzed, and, from the looks of it, Miss Britney Jean is a little more complex than, say, Paris Hilton. For starters, Britney is strong-willed and stubborn!Dennis Duez: "Britney is a very independent person, it's 'my way or the highway' with her. She has an upward to backward slant to the left that shows she's really obstinate toward doing things her way."She's giving!
DD: "The way the loop is formed into a Hershey's Kiss. It shows a giving spirit, a compassionate spirit."She's in pain!
"There are some indicators for abdominal stress. The o in movie, the lower right and upper right side have some dark spots."Oh god. "Abdominal stress"? Please tell us those are menstrual cramps, not another fucking zygote. More »
hilary duff
The Very Strange Allure Of Joel Madden
So, we hear from Radar that Hilary Duff has written an album full of dis tracks to her slightly-less-preposterous-than-Uncle-Joey-from-Full-House-but-just-slightly ex-BF Joel Madden, whose appeal to the Rachel Zoe set we can only describe as his mastery of the art of total what-the-fuckness. You know those guys you kinda love because you mistake the fact that they're like, total indie rock geeks but not skinny or even approaching "hip", and they make all their money off fantasy sports, and occasionally rock, like, ascots, for some unspecified form of individuality when really they are just always drunk? Well, we sort of think it's that, with a little bit of the "I've never fucked a guy with so litttle non-tattooed skin before!" More »
j. crew
