Miley Cyrus Plans on Escalating Her Sinéad O'Connor Feud on SNL

There's a rumor going 'round this fine morning that Miley Cyrus will use her hosting/musical guest privileges tonight on Saturday Night Live to escalate her feud with Sinéad O'Connor to DEFCON 6. This will most likely entail, explains the magpie contracted to spy on NBC's Studio 8H, a Weekend Update routine and… » 10/05/13 11:30am 10/05/13 11:30am

Pope Says You'll Get into Heaven Faster if You Follow Him on Twitter

Catholics who click on to the pope's Twitter feed on Catholic World Youth Day — a week-long event* that starts on July 22 — will gets an "indulgence", which is basically a get out of purgatory free card. The more you get, the faster you get the heck out of that hell-ish hole and straight up to the big dog's ice cream… » 7/17/13 11:30pm 7/17/13 11:30pm

Samantha Bee Knows the Secret Behind the Pope's Resignation

Yesterday, Benedict XVI became the first pope to resign from the papacy in over 600 years, sparking rumors that it was some sort of controversy that forced him to step down from the position. It's hard to imagine just how bad it could get for the Catholic church to hold one of their own responsible (what — did he say… » 2/12/13 1:00pm 2/12/13 1:00pm

Irish Priest May Publicly Defy the Vatican About Advocating for Female…

If you're monitoring your news feed today, you might get to watch Rev. Tony Flannery, a 66-year-old Irish Catholic priest with no threshold for doctrinal bullshit, throw down a serious gauntlet against the Vatican when he defies orders from Vatican authorities not to speak out about his advocacy for a more open-minded… » 1/20/13 12:30pm 1/20/13 12:30pm

Italy’s Vanity Fair Cover Story Is All About How Handsome the Pope’s…

The beautiful mug of the most handsome Jesus wizard in the Vatican, Georg Ganswein, has graced the cover of Italy's Vanity Fair, proof either that the Catholic Church is trying to glamour Italians into becoming more religious, or that good-looking people really do have a professional leg-up on the rest of us uggos. » 1/17/13 1:15pm 1/17/13 1:15pm

Bare Breasts Fail to Stir the Pope’s Cold, Lifeless Heart

Women go topless to protest the Vatican's opposition to gay marriage in St. Peter's Square at the Vatican, Sunday, Jan. 13, 2013. Police quickly took the women away, and the Pope appeared not to have been disturbed as he delivered his traditional prayer from his studio window overlooking the piazza. On their bare… » 1/13/13 12:30pm 1/13/13 12:30pm

Hark! The Pope Hath Tweeted His First Tweets

Everyone is expressing their excitement over 12/12/12 in different ways, whether it be by throwing 12/12/12 parties, updating their Facebook status or getting married. (I celebrated by hitting snooze 3 times and eating oatmeal.) Even Benedict XVI, the pope himself, is excited. Why else would he use today to send out… » 12/12/12 11:05am 12/12/12 11:05am

Guess What, Everyone? The Vatican Haaaated J.K. Rowling’s New Book

I think we'd all like to believe that, sitting next to a reading lamp and swaddled in his Holy Snuggie somewhere deep inside the Vatican's intestinal labyrinths, Pope Benedict Palpatine Vader XVI read The Casual Vacancy with a mounting sense of disappointment that Harry Potter didn't make at least a cameo appearance.… » 11/04/12 6:01pm 11/04/12 6:01pm

Badass 1930s Lady Writes a Poem to the Pope to Tell Him What's Up

These days, we can blog and tweet when we're pissed about the patriarchy. But back in 1937, Florence O'Donnell Maher couldn't use social media to vent about how angry she was at the Pope for telling women not to use birth control. So she wrote him an amazing poem. "She had 10 children so she knew what was up," adds… » 8/20/12 5:20pm 8/20/12 5:20pm

Women Try to Rebrand the Catholic Church's Position on Contraception

Catholicism is well known for its opposition to contraception, but some women within the church are attempting to paint the church's stance on birth control as freeing rather than restrictive. How are they going to pull that off? By promoting natural family planning as an accepted Catholic practice for avoiding… » 4/16/12 12:00pm 4/16/12 12:00pm

Pope Vows Never to 'Tolerate' Lady Priests

Yesterday, a cranky 84-year-old man, tired from a "grueling" trip, delivered a stern diatribe against gender equality based solely on an irrational, antiquated tradition. Why do we care? Because that man is Pope Benedict XVI, so what he says goes for millions of Catholics, and he's laying down the law: women must… » 4/06/12 11:50am 4/06/12 11:50am

Catholic Church Extends Forgiveness For Abortion, But Only Through…

If you're a Catholic woman who's had an abortion and are interested in no longer being excommunicated, you should make your way to Madrid — fast. In a special, limited-time offer, the church is making it easier for those who confess to having an abortion to obtain absolution and rejoin the church. » 8/19/11 5:40pm 8/19/11 5:40pm